What doesn't kill you makes you stranger
by Lady Avotil
Summary: Harry leads the life of a slave. What will happen when one of Gotham's most infamous villains decides to barge into his life? Can Hogwarts handle a Harry raised by none other than the Joker? Be prepared for madness and insanity.
1. Chapter 1

Hi People!^_^

Well, here is chapter one of my first Batman and Harry Potter crossover. I do hope that you'll enjoy reading the story.^_^

Oh, and this story is partially based in the movie "Batman begins/The Dark Knight" universe, partially in the "Batman – The Animated series" universe and, of course, the Harry Potter universe.^_^

Enjoy reading chapter 1 and please leave a review at the end!^_^

_**Harry Potter x Batman**_

_**Chapter 1: The Beginning**_

It was a pleasant October evening – not warm, but not too cold either. It was perfect for this time of year, actually. It was the 31st October – Halloween. The night, on which, according to Celtic legends, the ghosts of the people that had died during the year would rise up and haunt their relatives, as well as the homes where they once lived. However, as time went on this day became a holiday, where children dressed in costumes of monsters, witches, ghosts and many other fantastical creatures and went around trick or treating.

Godric's Hollow was no different on that day than any other place in the world. Little children were running from house to house, carrying little pumpkins filled with sweets pilfered…uh, sorry, _received_ from other houses. The atmosphere, despite the many little ghouls and monsters crowding the streets, was pleasant and joyous. Shouts of excitement and happy laughter filled the air.

However, one man chose to ignore all of that as he determinedly strode towards a seemingly empty space, where, by all rights, a house should have been standing. Said man wore long, black robes that seemed to be made out of the lightest material in the world, floating around him, as if the pieces of cloth were nothing more than smoke. It created an ominous air around him. The man's most horrifying feature, though, was his face.

It was white as chalk. There was no hair. His eyes were a vicious, blood-red colour and with slits as pupils. A nose was visibly absent from his face, replaced by two, snake-like nostrils. In fact, the man looked more like said reptile than a human being. Spider-like, long, white fingers casually held what appeared to be a piece of wood. Admittedly, it was a beautifully-carved piece of yew, but wood nonetheless.

One of the many children running around stopped right in front of the man and gaped at his appearance. The boy was dressed as a (supposedly) fearsome pirate.

"Woah! Your costume is wicked, mister!" the child exclaimed as it looked at the man's serpentine face, two crimson-coloured eyes scrutinizing the boy.

A child's attention span tended to be short. So without even waiting for a reply, the boy continued on his quest for candy and the man sneered in disgust after the boy.

Lord Voldemort proceeded to once again go back to his current mission – get to the Potter house and kill the small family. He was glad that he had managed to trick Wormtail into serving him by promising the rat Animagus power. It was ridiculous, really. Lord Voldemort didn't give power to unworthy followers such as Peter Pettigrew. Then again, the whimpering and cowering coward had proven to be useful. After all, if it weren't for him, the Dark Lord would have remained clueless as to the Potters' location and, in that way, very vulnerable. After hearing the prophecy from one of his most trusted followers the Dark Lord had immediately known that he would have to act swiftly and remove any and all threats to his rise to power.

Reaching the empty spot between two other houses, Voldemort closed his eyes and thought of the words his newest servant had told him to think. _**The Potters' house may be found at Godric's Hollow, Griffin's Lane, number 6.**_Opening his eyes once more, the Dark Lord watched in glee as the house was slowly, but surely, revealed. Taking a step forward, the darkest wizard in a century breached the wards of the house that contained the Wizarding World's only hope of survival.

_**Meanwhile, inside the house…**_

Lily Potter was happily feeding her 15-month-old son with baby food. She had been beyond happy when she had found out she was pregnant and going to be a mother. The anticipation had grown as the months had slowly passed and the date of the birth had drawn nearer. Smiling slightly, the red-haired woman remembered the birth itself.

_Flashback_

_ Lily Potter shot a glare at her husband as another wave of pain wracked her body._

_ "Damn you James Potter! It's your fault that I am going through this now! I won't ever let you near me again, do you hear me!" she shouted angrily._

_Two hours and a lot of screaming later, the green-eyed witch lay panting in the hospital bed, waiting for the healers to give her baby to her. The first few minutes after her son had been born were hectic and the two new parents had become worried. Hearing a sigh of relief from the head-healer, they turned to look at each other before glancing at the medical wizard. _

"_Uh, excuse me, but why did you just sound so relieved?" James hesitantly asked._

"_Well, Mr. Potter, the umbilical cord __**(?)**__ was wrapped around your son's throat, restricting his breathing. Thankfully we managed to cut it in time. Relax, the baby is fine" the healer informed the panicked father, trying to calm him down at the same time._

_Shortly after that, __the newly-born Harry James Potter left St. Mungoes with his parents._

_End of Flashback_

Lily shook her head, concentrating once again on the tricky task of feeding her son. Harry was odd, that was for sure. The green-eyed woman could hardly believe that the baby with her green-eyes and the little tuft of black hair on its little head from a year ago had become the small toddler sitting in front of her now.

The small toddler was dressed in a light-blue baby suit **(?)** and his green and blue eyes were looking on in amusement as his mother tried to feed him. That was one of the two strange things about Harry's appearance – his eyes. They were, at the same time, a sky-blue colour around the pupil and emerald green after that. An eye-colour that was an equal mix between blue and green wouldn't have been odd, except that in this case the blue and green were cleanly separated from one another, only slightly merging where they met. Where the blue colour came from was also a mystery.

James' eyes were brown and hers were green. Logically speaking, the brown colour should have prevailed, seeing as it was a dominant gene in general. Biology had, of course, proven that Lily could have passed on the coding for blue eyes along with the green ones to her soon, but the chances were non-existent, really. Neither James, nor Lily had a single person in their family who had blue eyes.

The second odd thing about their son was his hair. It was jet-black, unlike his father's dark brown or mother's fiery red colour. It was neither straight, nor unruly, but spiked. Those were things his parents could accept without problem. But what bothered them (slightly) was that the tips of the spikes were all a dark, forest green colour. It baffled them to no end, due to the sole reason that it was natural. No tempering with hair-dye or a stray magic spell. Even the healers were confused by this small oddity. But the two parents still loved their son and were proud as any other parents would be.

Just as Lily was trying to, once again, get the spoon with the baby food into her son's mouth, James abruptly burst into the kitchen, wand out.

"Lily, it's him. Go upstairs and lock the door. I'll protect you" he told his wife before tenderly kissing her on the lips, ruffling his son's hair and then going back out into the hallway.

The red-haired witch quickly scooped up her son and ran upstairs with him. She could hear the sound of spells flying coming from the hallway. Shutting the door of her son's bedroom, she locked it with every single locking spell she knew.

Harry, in the mean time, was wondering why his mommy was running around so frantically and waving her wand in front of the door. It amused him, truth be told. His parents had been tense and on guard for the past few months and, despite the fact that they hadn't ignored him completely, they were almost constantly worried. And so the little toddler had taken it upon himself to bring some joy into the morbid and generally heavy atmosphere that ruled in the house. It turned out that pranking was like second nature to the baby boy and came as easily to him as breathing.

Even now he discreetly dropped one of his plush toys – a bear that squeaked when you pressed its tummy – on the ground about four feet from his cradle. Surely, in all of the hectic, his mommy would step on it at some point. Her reaction would be fun to watch.

At that moment the door was blasted off its hinges and Lord Voldemort strode into the room as if he owned the place. Lily berated herself. Of course: why would the Dark Lord do something as useless as unlocking a door? Blasting it off was so much easier.

"Step aside, you foolish woman!" the Dark Lord ordered.

"Please, take me, not Harry. Take me, not Harry" the green-eyed witch pleaded, dropping her wand to the floor. She knew that fighting Voldemort right now was useless, not to mention also dangerous for Harry – a stray spell might hit him.

"You, Lily Potter, are a bright and talented witch. Join me and I will spare you" the Dark Lord proposed.

He wasn't really all that interested in having her on his side, but he had promised Severus Snape to try and not kill her. Why that man, as brilliant and helpful as he was, wanted this Mudblood to be left alive was beyond Voldemort.

"Please, kill me, not Harry" Lily continued.

The Dark Lord was becoming irritated with the pleading of the woman in front of him and so he decided to grant her her wish.

"Fine. Die, Mudblood" he hissed, a green spell flying from his wand and hitting the redhead. The witch crumpled to the ground and stayed there, dead.

The Dark Lord briefly glanced at her body before turning his crimson eyes on the toddler sitting in the crib and who was looking at him with…curiosity? Voldemort did a double-take and looked at the child more closely. The toddler was indeed looking at him, Lord Voldemort, with curiosity, not even a trace of fear visible in the boy's two-coloured eyes. Voldemort knew that he had chosen wisely – this boy, and not Neville Longbottom, was the child of the prophecy.

"Avada Kedavra" Voldemort calmly said, taking a step forward to make sure that he wouldn't miss his target. That's when the unexpected happened.

Lord Voldemort, the darkest Dark Lord in a century, stepped on the teddy bear lying in front of the crib – making the bear squeak in the process – and slipped. The unforgivable curse missed the small boy by a mile and hit the mirror hanging on the wall behind the crib. The glass of the mirror shattered from the impact of the spell and a stray shard cut the baby boy on the forehead in a jagged line resembling a lightning bolt. The deadly spell rebounded and hit the still-falling Dark Lord in the chest, a surprised look frozen on his face. It all happened in less than two seconds.

The small boy looked at the now dead Dark Lord lying on the floor. Before Harry's very eyes the body disintegrated into dust, a smoky, white form leaving it and floating out of the window and into the night. The black and green-haired toddler yawned before lying down in his crib and falling asleep.

Harry had no idea whatsoever that he had just defeated the most feared Dark Lord in the history of the Wizarding World with nothing but a plush toy. The toddler slept peacefully on that fateful night, a small smile on his little face. He would never forget the picture of the funny-looking man slip on the teddy bear and fall on his back with a resounding "thump" and a small "oof" escaping him.

Not even 30 minutes later, Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore, Headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Head of the Order of the Phoenix, owner of the Order of Merlin First Class, Chief Warlock of the Wizengamot and nominee for the post of Minister of Magic for three times in a row (that's a lot of titles…) arrived at the Potter residence at Godric's Hollow, only to find it dark, eerily quiet and empty.

The aged wizard carefully entered the house and was immediately greeted by the sight of James Potter lying on the floor, unmoving. Closing his eyes in respect for a few moments, the old man continued up the stairs, staring in horror at the open room of James' son. The usually twinkling blue eyes of the Headmaster were filled with dread. The grey-haired and bearded old man stepped into the room, only to find Lily Potter sprawled next to the crib.

It saddened the old wizard to have lost two as bright and talented people as Lily Evans and James Potter, but their deaths were a necessary loss in his mind. After all, it was all for the greater good and Dumbledore would do anything to achieve it. Even if it meant making sure that the protections of this house were not as strong as they could have been. Suggesting Peter Pettigrew, a likely Death Eater candidate in the Headmaster's mind, was his own idea and they had, naturally, accepted it.

Looking around the room Dumbledore noticed a small pile of ash on the floor, a yew wand he knew all too well lying right next to it. The old wizard smiled – so Voldemort was defeated after all. The once again twinkling blue eyes rose to the crib right in front of him and what he saw inside displeased him. Greatly.

The little boy was still alive and sleeping without a care in the world. Seeing the lightning bolt scar on the baby's forehead, the oh-so-wise wizard could only come to one conclusion – Harry Potter was the new saviour of the Wizarding World and, therefore, a threat to his fame and power. Picking the boy up, the old man disapparated with a small "pop" and reappeared in front of a house with a garden. This house was the Number 4 in a long row of similar houses and was situated on Private Drive in Surrey.

The old wizard took out a piece of parchment and self-inking quill from one of the many pockets of his purple robe and hastily wrote a small message on it. Fishing out an envelope from another pocket, he folded the parchment and put it inside. Harry Potter would be molded first here, by his "loving" relatives, and then by him into the perfect sacrificial lamb. He was quite sure of it and after all – Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore was never wrong. With that thought in mind, the old wizard disappeared once again, leaving the small toddler out in the cold. He had plans to make.

A few hours later, Petunia Dursley opened the front door and promptly screamed, waking up both her husband, Vernon, and her son, Dudley. This was the start of Harry James Potter's life at Number 4, Private Drive, Surrey.

_**Harry Potter x Batman**_

Well, I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Please leave a review!^_^


	2. Chapter 2: A new life

Hi People!^_^

I hope that you enjoyed reading the first chapter and that you will also enjoy reading this one.^_^

So Enjoy and please leave a review at the end!^_^

_**WARNING:**_ There will be blood spilt in this chapter and abuse. You have been warned.

_**Harry Potter x Batman**_

_**Chapter 2: A new life**_

Harry Potter was cutting the weed from his Aunt's garden. He never understood why the garden was so important to her. Pranks and jokes were far more amusing and entertaining than gardening.

"Get in here, freak!" his Uncle shouted from inside the house and Harry slowly got up from his crouched position in front of one of the many flower beds. He looked up at the sky and saw the setting sun. The scrawny child let out a sigh before turning around and walking back into the house, his head held low.

For the past 5 years, Harry had grown up in the Dursleys' household. But not as part of the family, oh no – he was their slave. Literally. The 6-year old boy had researched slavery in the local library. He, unlike his stupid cousin Dudley, had taught himself how to read at the age of 4 and, soon after that, basic Maths. He would turn 7 in two or so weeks and he had already gone through the material for primary school. In the field of science – any science – he was already on high school level material. The other subjects were of no interest to him mainly because they didn't affect him directly.

Looking at the squeaky clean floor, the small boy came to a stop in front of his uncle, who was sitting in the living room, watching TV. The black and green-haired boy knew what was going to happen and he was prepared for it. Pain had become an important, even primary, aspect of his life. It was the only thing that told him that he was still alive and that he did exist, unlike what his "loving" relatives repeatedly kept telling him.

Petunia Dursley looked up from what she was preparing for dinner to look at her sister's son, her nephew. From whatever angle she looked at the boy, he was a freak. His black hair was of medium length, just shy of short, spiky and had dark, forest green tips. It wasn't the most freakish feature of the boy, though. His eyes were. They were two-coloured, after all, and normal people didn't have two-coloured eyes. They just didn't. The lightning bolt-shaped scar on the boy's forehead was barely visible and Petunia was thankful for at least that. Her freakish nephew didn't have to stand out any more than he already did.

She and Vernon were called to the school's office almost every two or three days this school year. It seemed that her nephew had a penchant for pranking people. Those pranks often somehow injured the unfortunate victims. No matter how many times they punished the boy, he just kept doing what he did and didn't even feel sorry for it. Once he had even smiled when they had told him that he wouldn't have any food for an entire week! No normal person did something like that.

Harry looked through his spiky bangs at his uncle, his blue and green eyes looking bored. He knew that this time his punishment would be worse than usual. He had overheard his Uncle and Aunt talking last night. "Time to up his punishment to a new level" his Uncle had said. Harry was curious what they had come up with. Two weeks without food? More chores than he already had?

Just then his Uncle's fist rammed into his stomach and was shortly followed by his foot, making the 6-year old boy double over in pain. What the hell? His Uncle didn't beat him so strongly. Ever. After a few minutes of being beating, Harry was wobbling on his feet, barely standing. That alone was a miracle.

"Boy, today you didn't do all of your chores. You will be punished for that" his Uncle Vernon informed him whilst unbuckling his belt.

Blue and green eyes widened at the sight and words. Surely his Uncle wouldn't do what Harry thought he would. That was downright illegal. His Uncle didn't have the guts to do what he was, apparently, planning on doing, right? But the black and green-haired boy realized with growing horror in his two-coloured eyes that he was wrong as his uncle grabbed his shoulder and threw him on the floor, ripping the too-large shirt from Harry's malnourished body and exposing his back.

When the first blow landed, the 6-year old winced. The Buckle had 3 sharp points on both sides and they cut deeply into his back. The little boy managed to hold in his screams for the first 5 lashes, but the 6th one was harder than the others. A long howl of pain came from Harry's mouth as he felt the skin on his back being torn apart, blood flowing freely from the wounds. Only after the 15th lash did his Uncle stop, looking down at the bloodied figure of his nephew on the floor.

Just then there was a loud bang and the front door flew open. Lifting his head a little, the slightly dizzy boy watched as a strangely-dressed man walked through the door and into the house. The man was wearing purple pants, black shoes, a green vest and a purple jacket on top. His face was funny though, Harry thought. It was covered in white-makeup and a large, red smile was painted on, as well. Two big, black circles surrounded the man's dark brown eyes. His hair was tinted green, though it was visible that it was originally dirty-blond or maybe very light brown in colour.

"Get out of my house, you freak!" Vernon shouted.

"Aw, don't be so harsh. After all, we are all the same under the skin and I, for one, am willing to skin you to prove it" the clown replied whilst taking out a knife from one of his pockets and pointing it at Vernon, a maniacal smile on his face.

Petunia had hidden behind her husband and Dudley behind his mother. Only Harry hadn't moved. It didn't bother the young boy though – he found the situation quite amusing, despite the severe pain that radiated from his back.

"Oh, come on now – why so serious? Let's put some smiles on those faces" the clown said and Harry watched in fascination as the man jumped at Vernon and tackled the obese man to the ground. How could anyone possibly push that walrus down?

Both men fell to the ground and the clown, gripping his uncle's large head with one hand and holding it in place, proceeded to stick the knife into the weakly struggling man's mouth. With a sharp motion to the right, the knife went smoothly through his uncle's cheek, cutting it cleanly. The clown repeated the same with the other one. When he was done, he kicked his uncle in the groin and the man screamed, making the injuries on his face even worse. Harry thought that at the rate his uncle was going, he would die from the blood loss. A few minutes later, Harry's prediction came true – his uncle died with a "smile" on his face, his head lying in a pool of blood.

Petunia and Dudley were pressed against the wall and frozen in fear, not even moving a single muscle. They had watched in silence as the clown murdered Vernon. When the painted man turned to look at them, they both started quivering. To Harry's amusement, Dudley actually wet himself. A few minutes later both his Aunt and cousin were sporting similar "smiles" on their faces, tears streaming from their eyes as they realized that they were going to die in the same way as Vernon.

The clown stood up from the armchair he had sat down to watch his handiwork unfold and looked around the room. He had created a fine mess of the place – that was sure. Then his dark sienna eyes landed on the still bleeding Harry. The Joker frowned – he had not done this to the boy. Thinking about how he had found the little family, he concluded that the man had probably beaten the boy with the belt he had been holding at the time.

Harry was struggling to focus and concentrate on getting up. But the blood loss had weakened him considerably. Not that he was very strong to begin with. Slowly pushing himself up, the 6-year old managed to prop himself up against the side of the couch. Glancing quickly around the room he saw the strange man look at him with concern in his eyes. Harry smiled at him and, weakly pointing at the bloody bodies of his relatives, gave the man the thumbs up.

Needless to say, the Joker was shocked. This little boy – maybe around 5 years of age – had just, in short, complimented him on his way of killing the Dursleys. Looking more closely at the boy, he saw that the child's eyes were unique – both blue and green at the same time. The boy's black hair was slightly matted with blood, but the dark, forest green tips of his spikes were still visible. It was obvious to the Clown Prince of Crime that the people he had just killed were abusing this boy and if there was one thing he didn't tolerate, it was child abuse. Psychotic he may be, but even he wasn't that cold-hearted. Approaching the boy, he slightly bent forward.

"What's your name, kid?" the Joker asked, furrowing his brow in confusion as the child faintly smiled.

"Harry" the little boy replied, looking at the man with amusement in his eyes.

"Why are ya smiling?" the clown inquired of the boy, watching as a trickle of blood ran down from the corner of Harry's mouth.

"Cause what ya did was fun. I'd be laughing, but I think my Uncle managed to break several of my ribs" the boy answered, once again coughing.

Without even thinking the Joker bent down and scooped Harry into his arms. Making sure that he wouldn't drop the little boy, the Joker made his way towards the front door. He was not about to leave the kid alone, especially with injuries like those. Besides, the black and green-haired boy reminded him of himself after he had received his scars. He suddenly noticed that the boy was staring at him in confusion.

"What?" he asked as he opened the car he had come to the house with.

Placing Harry in the passenger seat and buckling **(?)** him in, he went to the other side of the car and made sat down in the driver's seat. Thankfully it was the middle of the night and no one was there.

"Nothing. You're just the first person who is actually nice to me" Harry replied with a small shrug of his shoulder before looking out of the window again. He had never been outside of Private Drive.

Hiding his shock, the Joker determinedly sped up the car – it was settled. He would take the boy with him to Gotham and would raise him. He would take care of Harry and teach him everything he needed to know. He smiled at that thought – the boy already seemed to be a bit like him. Gotham wouldn't know what hit it.

_**Two weeks later:**_

Harry got up and stretched before getting dressed in some of his new clothes. He put on a pair of black jeans, black trainers and an emerald green T-Shirt. The blue and green-eyed boy was very excited. It wasn't just his 7th birthday – the Joker had told him yesterday that he had a surprise for him today.

Harry liked surprises. Especially surprises by the Joker. He had come to love that man quite a lot – he was not only nice to Harry, but also encouraged, rather than suppressed, his creative (meaning pranking) side. He smiled as he remembered when he first arrived in Gotham City and his new home.

_Flashback_

_ Harry pressed himself up at the window of the car. The buildings around him were huge! Not to mention that there were so many people walking around.__ He found it odd that the people here apparently drove on the other side of the road and that the steering wheel of the car was on the left and not right side of the car._

_ The car stopped and the black and green-haired boy got out. Harry went over to where the Joker was waiting for him. He had a huge smile, no, a grin on his face as he held out his hand to the small boy. Gripping the clown's gloved hand, Harry followed him inside the apartment block and up the stairs. There were many stairs. In fa__ct, the apartment to which the Joker was leading him was on the top floor._

_ When the Joker opened the door of the apartment, Harry was surprised – it was the biggest place he had ever seen. It was almost like a penthouse, though not quite. But it was still very big. It was also very colourful. __When Harry saw all of the colours clashing or mixing together the small boy couldn't help but smile. It was very cheerful. The 6-year old laughed before abruptly stopping – he had been right that his uncle had managed to break a few of his ribs. Harry was immensely thankful that he healed at an almost supernatural rate. In a couple more days he would be fully healed._

_ "This place is huge! And colourful!" the spiky-haired boy exclaimed, making the Joker chuckle. _

_He had suspected that Harry would like this. It was the Joker's permanent apartment in Gotham. Yes, he had many hideouts, but this place was the only permanent one. It was just on the outskirts of Gotham and all of his hideouts were in the center. The Gotham police would never think to search for him this far away from the center._

"_Glad you like it, Harry" he said as he watched the 6 and not 5-year old – to his immense surprise – run around and explore the apartment a bit. Suddenly, Harry stopped and turned towards the Joker._

"_Hey, I never got to know what you're name is" came the oh-so-innocent words from the little boy's mouth. The Joker froze – should he tell Harry his real name? He shrugged as he figured that sooner or later the boy would hear about him in the news. He might as well tell Harry everything there was to know about him._

"_Well, my name is Jack Napier, but people know me by my alias "The Joker"…" he started and after 3 hours of talking he finished. Jack had told Harry his life's story and now he watched as the black and green-haired boy thought about everything. Would he still want to live with a psychotic mass murderer? He was, once again, surprised by the little boy's action – a smile. A bright smile. A very bright smile. _

"_Cool. Can I see some of your gadgets?" the curious boy inquired before jumping up and running off to one of the hallways, disappearing into it. A few second__s later the boy backpedaled and looked at Jack with a sheepish look on his face._

"_Uh…which direction?"_

_End of Flashback_

That was how Harry's new life began and he was very happy. Deliriously happy, actually, and all because he finally had something he could remotely call a family. He had met a few of the other supervillains in Gotham and they had all been surprised by Harry's sudden appearance. In the beginning there were even rumours that he was the Joker's son. But even despite that, they had absolutely loved Harry. Yes, it was a quirky family, but he at least finally had people who liked him for who he was. No one judged his appearance or the things he said. No one reprimanded him for his pranks and no one told him what to do. Harry was, for the first time in his conscious life, free.

As Harry finished combing his hair – as much as he could comb _spikes_ – his door opened to reveal Jack standing there. When he was at home, the Joker usually wore no make-up and Harry had been surprised to see that the man's scars were not as visible as he had assumed they were when he had seen him for the first time "au naturel".

"Hiya Jack! So, what's the surprise? Tell me, tell me, tell me!" the 6-year old excitedly asked, bouncing up and down in his excitement, a huge grin plastered on his face and his eyes sparkling with joy.

"Alright, alright. Calm down! Well, here it is" the man laughed as he tried to get Harry to stand still, an equally big grin on his face.

He handed Harry a dark blue box. Inclining his head slightly to the right, Harry tried to figure out what the box contained. Taking it into his small hands, the green and blue-eyed boy carefully opened it and his eyebrows shot up in surprise. Inside was…an ordinary sheet of paper? Looking more closely, he read the words on the very top of the page, his eyes widening almost comically when he did.

"Adoption Form" he whispered under his breath, tears of happiness starting to form in his eyes. Jack was adopting him.

Jack could only blink in confusion as tears started running down Harry's cheeks. That was all the warning he had before he suddenly had an armful of crying 6-year, pardon, _7_-year old.

"Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!" Harry repeatedly told Jack as he clung onto him. The Joker could not believe that something as simple as adopting Harry would make the boy so happy.

"I'm glad that you like my surprise and I hope you like your new name too" Jack said, making Harry look at the adoption form once again. There, in clear writing, was Harry's new name: Jacob John Napier.

"It's perfect" Harry replied, hugging Jack once again.

Harry closed his eyes as a ridiculously big smile covered his face and a warm feeling spread throughout his entire body. Unbeknownst to the two very happy people in the room, a golden glow had surrounded them. Unbeknownst to them, Harry's magic had just made the adoption not only ever-lasting, but also official in the Wizarding World.

In a certain castle on another continent, the Hogwarts register book for future students underwent a change – the name _**Harry James Potter**_ disappeared from the list of names and the name _**Jacob John Napier **_appeared.

Harry James Potter, saviour of the Wizarding World, was dead.

_**Harry Potter x Batman**_

Well, I hope you enjoyed this chapter. It was difficult for me to think up a new middle name for Harry, so I hope that "John" is suitable.^_^

Oh, and my Joker is based on the Joker portrayed by Heath Ledger in "The Dark Knight". As for his real name – well, I've seen it come up in so many fanfic's, that I can only assume it is his real name…^_^'…

Please leave a review!^_^


	3. Chapter 3: Gotham Zoo

Hi People!^_^

Well, here is chapter 3. I'm sorry that it's a bit shorter than the other two but it was kinda hard to find a suitable ending…^_^'…

From this chapter onwards, Harry will be known by the name _**Jacob**_.

Anyway, enjoy reading chapter 3 and please leave a nice little review at the end!^_^

_**Harry Potter x Batman**_

_**Chapter 3: **__**Gotham Zoo**_

Jacob was excited. Today Jack, his dad, would take him to the zoo. It had been something that he had always wanted to do but because of the Dursley's had never been allowed to. It had been difficult for him to watch Dudley go with his little gang of troublemakers go to the zoo and enjoy themselves whilst he would have to clean the house or stay with Mrs. Figg.

Now Jack had promised him yesterday, after giving him the Adoption Form, that he would take Jacob to the Gotham Zoo as an additional birthday present. Jacob was not only excited because he would finally go to the zoo and see all of the animals that he had only read about in books until then, but he would also be going there with his father.

His father…Jacob still couldn't believe that Jack had adopted him. Not only had he saved him from the Dursleys, but he had given him a family. Sure, it was a slightly dysfunctional and probably mostly insane one, but hey – he wasn't about to complain. After all, it had always been one of Jacob's greatest hopes that some long-lost relative would come and rescue him from the Dursleys and even though Jack wasn't related to him by blood, he was closer and far more important to Jacob than the Dursleys, who actually _were_ blood related to him, were.

Looking between the front door and the door to Jack's room/study, Jacob decided that too much time had already passed. Walking over to his father's room, the black and green-haired boy knocked on it. Opening the door, green and blue-coloured eyes rolled in disbelief when Jack quietly cursed and started getting his shoes on. Jacob let out a long sigh.

"You know – we should have already left" Jacob calmly said as he leaned against the doorframe and waited for his father to get ready.

"Well, you know how it is – making plans, getting henchmen, finding safe houses and getting all of the stuff together" Jack replied as he put on his black, denim jacket.

Ruffling his son's spiky hair as he walked out of his room, the Clown Prince of Crime couldn't help but chuckle and smile at Jacob's faint protest. The notion that he was a father was still new to Jack and the blond-haired man knew that it wouldn't be an easy task. But he was determined to succeed in it and to take care of Jacob.

He had always wanted to have a family, but due to his mental health – if it could even be called "health" – the chances of him finding a woman that loved him for who he was and not for the monster that everyone thought he was were slim to none. Adopting Jacob had seemed so natural, so normal, to Jack that he had done it without even the slightest bit of hesitation. Actually, if it weren't for the fact that he had never gone to England before he went there and stumbled across Jacob, he would have said that Jacob really was his son.

Admittedly, he didn't have natural green hair or even natural black hair for that matter, but in all other aspects Jacob was similar to Jack. The blue part of his eyes was the same as his own, even though at first glance they seemed brown. Jacob's face was also similar in shape to Jack's. Now that Jacob was eating normally, he had started filling out and had grown a bit as well. As a result, the similarity between Jacob's stature and Jack's at Jacob's age was also great. It really wasn't all that difficult to assume that Jacob really _was_ Jack's biological son.

And that was only the physical comparisons. The way Jacob acted reminded Jack more and more of himself at Jacob's age with every passing day. The pranks were only the start, Jack was sure about that. How was he supposed to know that the boy he had rescued from that cruel and, thankfully, now dead family in England had a pranking and joking streak a mile wide? It was even greater than his own and that was a frightening thought. At least the boy acted normally and not like a psychotic or even remotely insane person.

Whilst Jack was thinking about this, Jacob was wondering about what kind of animals he would see. He had always been fascinated by wolves and snakes. Did the Gotham Zoo have wolves? Jacob sure hoped they did. He had always wanted to see the sneaky, yet magnificent form of a snake up close or the majestic and fearless one of a wolf.

Jacob grinned as the car neared the entrance for the parking lot of the Gotham Zoo. He could hardly wait to get out of the car and into the zoo. He was, in fact, bouncing in his seat – he was just _**that**_ excited. Jack chuckled as he watched his son's actions. Really, who knew that a simple visit to the zoo would cheer up a person so much? Not to mention the fact that even though Jacob was only 7 years old, his behaviour was affecting Jack's greatly. Children were such bundles of endless energy.

_**Three hours later:**_

The visit to the zoo had been fairly uneventful. Until they had reached the Reptile House, that is. Now, whilst Jack was fondness of reptiles in general, Jacob's affection towards the creatures was just frightening. He treated them as if they were cute, little and very cuddly, white rabbits! Oh, and he could also speak to snakes.

It had happened in front of the cage of an Egyptian Asp, of all snakes. Jacob had stared at the lonely snake and, even though that particular snake species was a symbol of darkness and evil since the days of Cleopatra, the black and green-haired boy had managed to connect with it. Probably because Jacob knew what it felt like to be alone.

"I know what you feel like" the blue and green-eyed boy quietly told the snake, watching as it lifted its head from where it had been lying in boredom.

"A human who speaks the tongue of the snakes?" the Egyptian Asp hissed in surprise, startling Jacob.

"You can understand me?" the 7-year old inquired hesitantly, looking around for any other people. Thankfully, it being close to closing hours, no one wanted to be in the Reptile House.

"Yes, just as you understand me" the black snake hissed back, watching in curiosity as the human boy in front of her furrowed his brow in confusion.

"But to me it's like you are talking in English" Jacob informed the snake.

"Jacob, why are you hissing at that snake?" Jack questioned his son, wondering if Jacob wasn't slowly loosing his mind. Maybe he was a bad influence on his son?

"I'm just talking to her. And she understands me! And I can understand her! Isn't that great, dad?" Jacob told Jack, grinning happily whilst the Clown Prince of Crime could only stare at him.

"Human boy, what is your name?" the Egyptian Asp asked the black and green-haired boy, her green eyes looking into his dual-coloured ones.

"Jacob. What's your name?" he returned the question, a small smile on his face.

"Wadjet, young one. I would like to become your companion. If you could free me from this plastic prison, I would be forever thankful" she hissed, looking expectantly at him.

"I'd love to, Wadjet, but unfortunately we don't have any explosives with us" Jacob sadly answered, his gaze lingering on the ground.

"You could use your magic, young one. You are very powerful for one so young" the Egyptian Asp continued, drawing a surprised look from Jacob.

"Magic? But I am no wizard – I am just an ordinary human" he countered, determined that the female snake had lost her mind.

Yet at the same time the black and green-haired boy was thinking overtime – could magic be the reason for the strange things that had happened in his life until now? The more Jacob thought about it, the more plausible it seemed and the more convinced he was that Wadjet was right.

"All right, I'll give it a try" Jacob told his new friend before closing his eyes.

Alright, closing his eyes certainly didn't have any immediate effects. What did he have to do? Wish for the glass to disappear? Search for some kind of energy source within him and attach the power to the glass and then pull the glass away? No, that would result in too great a risk for injury. Wishing for the glass to disappear it was.

Jack was still staring at his son – talking to snakes? That was downright ridiculous. As Jacob closed his eyes and seemed to concentrate on something, Jack wondered if he really wasn't a bad influence on the young boy. After all, living with a psychotic mass murderer could very well have some kind of mental side-effect.

The blonde-haired man was just about ready to take his son and get out of the Reptile House when suddenly, with a faint "pop", the glass behind which the Egyptian Asp was situated (?) vanished in front of his very own eyes. Blinking a few times, the stunned supervillain watched as the snake slithered out of her "cage" and loosely wrapped herself around Jacob's shoulders, affectionately flicking her tongue across the boy's cheek. And Jacob laughed. He laughed, even though one of the most well known poisonous snakes in the entire world was curled so closely around him. Close enough to easily kill him with one single bite in the jugular.

"We can go home now, dad" Jacob said, grinning from ear to ear as he took Jack's hand in his own and started leading him out of the Reptile House.

As they walked passed the people that were still in the zoo, Jack became very suspicious. There was absolutely no way that these people didn't notice a venomous Egyptian Asp hanging around Jacob's neck. No way. At all. I mean, walking around with a snake around your shoulders and in plain view in broad daylight wasn't something that happened everyday, right? So the people should have at least seen the poisonous snake. Then, suddenly, something else occurred to the Clown Prince of Crime.

The snake was around Jacob's neck. Jacob was going home with him. Since the black and green-haired boy hadn't removed the snake yet, this could mean only one thing – the Egyptian Asp was coming with them. At home. There would be a very poisonous snake in their home. Shaking his head, Jack could only ask himself one thing – what would happen next? Surely talking to snakes was as far as things would go, right?

Getting into the car after exiting the zoo unnoticed by the guards, which only served to raise the supervillain's concern another notch, the Clown Prince of Crime turned his head slightly to look at his son. Who was, once again, hissing at the snake. And the snake was actually hissing back. It really did seem like they were having a conversation. An interesting one, if the look on Jacob's face and the gleam in his green and blue eyes were anything to go by.

Jack had noticed that little gleam always appeared when his son was learning new information. He absorbed knowledge like a sponge, soaked it up and kept it. The blonde-haired man had been astonished when he had learned that Jacob was up to high school-level material in science. Not only that, but the black and green-haired 7-year-old had memorized every single word in the books he had read. A photographic memory, it was called. He had looked it up on the internet.

Thirty minutes later and the Clown Prince of Crime and his son were entering their apartment. After taking his shoes off and making sure that Jacob had taken off his as well, the supervillain led the small boy into the living room and made the slightly confused black and green-haired boy sit on the couch. Sitting down next to him, the Joker looked at his son's blue and green eyes with his steel blue ones, raising an eyebrow in question. He wanted answers and he wanted them now.

"What?" the innocent question came out of the 7-year-old's mouth, making Jack sigh in annoyance, though a smile was tugging at his lips.

"An explanation would be nice, Mr. I-can-talk-to-snakes-and-make-glass-windows-disappear" the blonde-haired man said, a lilt in his voice at the end and a small smile on his face.

"Well, turns out I am wizard" Jacob told Jack, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world, snickering slightly at the stunned look on his father's face.

"What, like a rabbit-out-of-the hat wizard?" the Joker inquired, his doubt on the matter clearly audible in his voice.

"No, the kind with a wand, flying broomsticks and turning people into actual animals kind of wizard" the 7-yea-old chirped, a ridiculously large grin on his face.

A similar grin appeared on the Joker's face. His son had magic that could make glasses vanish and who knew what else it. Oh yes, Gotham wouldn't know what hit it when he and Jacob got to work on the city.

But Jacob was still too young. He was only 7 and he had no knowledge of how to defend himself, whether it was with or without a weapon. Alright, martial arts lessons first and then weapon training. He didn't like the idea of getting a child so young involved into the mess that was Gotham's battles against the supervillains. Batman's battle against them. But, knowing Jacob, he probably would make Jack take him along for the ride, as it were. But the fun of doing all of that would be tremendous.

Yes, until he deemed Jacob ready he would not allow his son to participate in any of the "jobs" he did. Of course, being able to fight wasn't the only important thing. Certain skills were needed for a successful bank heist or other similar activities. Skills and knowledge, of course.

However, until the moment came when Jacob would commit his first crime there was still a lot of time. They had to think about certain things first anyway. Important supervillain things like villain name, costume, calling card, weapons…

_**Harry Potter x Batman**___

Well, I hope you enjoyed reading this chapter.^_^

_**Wadjet**_ is the name of the Snake Goddess in Ancient Egyptian times and I thought that the name would be kinda fitting, seeing as the snake _**is**_ an Egyptian Asp. It was supposedly this species of snake that killed Cleopatra and it has been a symbol of darkness and evil since then. At least as far as I know.^_^

I will try and get the Joker more in character and less OOC in the next chapter, I promise. It just isn't easy getting into the mind of a psychotic mass murderer, although it certainly is or rather will be an interesting experience.^_^

Oh, and a bit of additional information – Jacob will have no glasses. Makes his uniquely-coloured eyes more noticeable.^_^

I hope you enjoyed reading chapter 3. Please leave a review!^_^


	4. Chapter 4: Wolf, Name and Harley

Hi People!^_^

Well, here is chapter 4. I kinda felt guilty for making chapter 3 so short, so this one's longer. I also hope that the Joker is more in character than in the last chapter. It's really not easy to get his behaviour right…^_^'…

Well, enjoy reading chapter 4 and please leave a nice little review at the end!^_^

_**Harry Potter x Batman**_

_**Chapter 4: Wolf, Name and Harley**_

Jack lay down on his bed, looking at the colourfully painted ceiling. Four years to this day had passed since he had adopted Jacob. Many things had happened since then and the Clown Prince of Crime could only grin as he thought about some of them.

For example Jacob's second visit to the zoo, a few months after his first one. Why so soon? Well, due to the entire Reptile House fiasco they hadn't managed to get to the part of the zoo where the wolves were kept.

_Flashback_

_ Jacob was dragging J__ack to where he could see the wolves ahead. Once again it was close to closing hours and so there were no people there. The Clown Prince of Crime suddenly had an odd sense of déjà vu. Freezing in place he remembered what had happened at the Reptile House not so long ago. The blond-haired man grinned. Well, this would certainly be interesting._

_ Jacob was already leaning on the fence and looking at the pack of wolves. There were 7 in total, the black and green-haired boy counted – one white wolf, three silver-grey ones and three dark grey ones. Suddenly the young boy saw something moving from the corner of his eye. Narrowing his eyes to get a better look, the 7-year-old's eyes widened when they finally made out the form of a wolf cub lying next to a tree trunk. It almost seemed as if the rest of the pack had kicked out the little wolf cub, leaving it to fend for itself. Not that the caretakers would just abandon it, but the black wolf cub seemed almost completely isolated from the rest of the pack. Like an outsider._

_ Jacob was reminded of his first school year. Dudley had beaten anyone and everyone that dared to approach him. As a result, the black and green-haired boy had had no friends whatsoever. Oh, he had played many pranks, that was true, but he had still remained completely friendless. Just as he had done when he was talking to Wadjet for the first time, Jacob looked around for any people. Only he and his father were there. Smiling, the blue and green-eyed boy hoisted himself up and jumped over the fence._

_ Jack's grin fell from his face as he stared in horror as his son jumped into the wolves' territory. And wolves were very territorial animals. He watched with slight worry as Jacob crouched down on all fours the moment the wolves of the pack noticed him. The white wolf – obviously the alpha male of the pack – started growling at Jacob, barring his sharp can__ines as he did so. To the blond-haired man's amazement, Jacob imitated the alpha and started growling as well. Oh, it wasn't a particularly frightening growl, but it worked – Jacob had established a conversation with the alpha._

_ What Jack, however, didn't know was that Jacob really __**was**__ communicating with the white wolf. The 7-year-old boy loved wolves and so, as a result, had learned everything he could about them from the books in the local library in Surrey. That included the way wolves communicated with each other. Sadly, Jacob didn't have a tail, so he would have to settle for body posture and growling. The fact that the black-and green-haired boy actually heard words from the alpha's growl was just an added bonus._

_ "Human, what are you doing on our territory!" the white wolf growled, clearly angry that someone, a human he didn't know at that, had invaded his territory._

_ "I wish to check up on the black wolf cub" Jacob growled in return, taking on a slightly defensive, yet at the same time also submissive posture._

_ It surprised the black and green-haired boy that he could understand the wolf leader as if he were speaking English. He guessed that it was similar to his ability to speak to snakes. He resisted the urge to grin – it would show he was mocking the leader and, frankly, Jacob preferred to leave the wolves' territory in one piece. As it was, the 7-year-old was surprised when the alpha male's posture abruptly changed from offensive to, in short, uninterested. A very unusual reaction, Jacob noted to himself._

_ "Do as you wish with the cub. He does not belong to our pack" the leader replied, turning around and heading to where the wolves probably slept at night._

_ Letting out a breath Jacob didn't know he had been holding, the small boy returned to his self-imposed mission of going to the cub. As the black and green-haired boy almost reached the cub, the little wolf opened his eyes and Jacob was completely stunned. The wolf cub's eyes were exactly like his own – both blue and green at the same time. Then something happened that Jacob didn't expect – the wolf cub perked up his little ears at seeing Jacob, leapt up and jumped onto the startled boy. Loosing his balance, Jacob fell onto his back and closed his eyes. Would the little wolf cub injure him? That's when he felt a wet sensation on his left cheek. Daring to open one eye, the 7-year-old was shocked to see the black wolf cub licking his face and wagging its little tail._

_ Jack was torn between doing two things – staring at his son with his mouth hanging open __or grinning. Finally, the blond-haired man settled on grinning. Well now, this was an interesting development. His son could not only talk to snakes, but also, apparently, to wolves. It also seemed as if they would be taking home yet another animal from the zoo. The Clone Prince of Crime knew that getting out of the zoo wouldn't be a problem –they had managed it the first time with the snake, after all._

_ "Hey, dad! Ophois here can come with us, right?" Jacob asked, holding a very happy wolf cub in his arms._

_ "Of course, Jacob. What's one more animal?" Jack nonchalantly replied, still grinning at this new finding. Great – now they not only had a poisonous snake, but also a dangerous wolf. Well, soon-to-be dangerous wolf._

_End Flashback_

It turned out a few weeks later that Ophois was a magical creature – a shadow wolf, a species near extinction. The Ancient Egyptian wizards once revered these creatures, but after the decline of the Ancient Egyptian culture, the shadow wolves slowly died out. Ophois was one of the few left and it appeared that he was meant to be Jacob's familiar. After all, what other reason could there possibly be for their eye-colour matching?

Having a shadow wolf as a bonded familiar turned out to also have a few great benefits. One of these was the ability to control, or rather to manipulate, the shadows. Jacob had perfected his control of the power and was now a master at using it. The second one made it possible for the black and green-haired boy to actually turn into a wolf. It was difficult for Jack not to think that Ophois and Jacob were brothers – they looked so similar. The only difference between them was that Jacob was slightly bigger and that his black fur had dark, forest green tips. Like his spiky, black hair when he was a human.

The transformation also had a few lingering effects on Jacob's human form – the boy's canines were sharper than normal ones and also slightly longer. This reminded the Clown Prince of Crime oddly enough of vampire teeth. The most obvious characteristic, though, were the two upside down, dark, forest green, almost black, oblong triangles on Jacob's cheeks. And they weren't removable either – he would have them for the rest of his life. One of the other benefits was the heightened seeing, hearing and smelling senses.

This brought Jack to the time when he and Jacob had sat down to discuss possible villain names for the boy. That happened two years ago, when the boy was 9.

_Flashback_

_ Sitting on the living room couch, the Joker watched as his 9-year-old soon walked back and forth. He chuckled slightly in amusement. He couldn't really blame the boy, though – today was a very special day. They were finally choosing his villain name._

_ The blond__-haired man thought about his son's training. Jacob was truly a prodigy when it came to learning new things. And not only on an intellectual level. Being a supervillain required certain skills, like the ability to fight. And boy did Jacob quickly pick up those skills. He had taken to martial arts like a fish to water. What was the boy's favorite fighting style? The black and green-haired boy had taken different aspects from different martial arts and had created his very own fighting style – the Eye of the Hawk._

_It was composed of fast-paced movements, striking an opponent quickly and precisely in the vital spots. It used everything from kicks and punches to karate chops and palm-strikes. That was the offensive aspect of the style. The defense was nigh impenetrable, giving the user the ability to not only swiftly attack, but also easily block any incoming attacks. As far as anyone of Gotham's supervillains knew, it was the ultimate fighting style._

_In addition to that, the young boy had learned how to handle a gun – an absolutely must for supervillains all over the world – and another weapon of his choice. That weapon turned out to be a Japanese katana, surprisingly enough. After introducing the still 7-year-old Jacob to the w__orld of manga and, including, the world of "Bleach", the Clown Prince of Crime found himself taking care of many wounds, mostly cuts, but also bruises. Jacob had taken it upon himself to learn the art of kendo – the way of the sword. And, once again surpassing the Joker's expectations, had managed to master the basics and then some of the more advanced forms of wielding a katana. As if that wasn't enough, the black and green-haired boy had also found the time to combine his own fighting style with kendo. The result was frightening. _

_The fact that Jacob had also taken it upon himself to master his magic made the 9-year-old a very dangerous opponent. Jacob had learned to superpower his punches and kicks, as well as to levitate objects, repel them, call them to him. __The blue and green-eyed boy had also invented a long-range attack that sent lightning from his fingers in a concentrated beam at an opponent. It wasn't enough to kill a person, but singe and knock them out? Yes. Another ability that the black and green-haired boy had discovered was teleportation. That would come in very handy in the foreseeable future._

_Chuckling once again at the frustrated face of his son, Jack stood up and went over to where Jacob was walking around, looking at the floor with a look of deep concentration on his face and a determined gleam in his two-coloured eyes. Flicking the obviously distraught boy on the nose, the Joker smiled at the startled yelp of his son._

"_Relax, Jake. It's not as if you have a time-limit" the blond-haired man tried to calm down his son whilst guiding him to the couch and pointing at it for him to sit down._

"_But I am! My first bank heist will be in three days and I still haven't been able to come up with a suitable name!" Jacob exclaimed, fiddling with his silver dragon pendant nervously._

"_You don't just think up a name, son – you gotta feel it!" Jack informed Jacob happily, earning himself a look of confusion and annoyance from his son._

"_Alright, look, think about thing, characteristics, abilities that define you. Things that you like, you know" he explained, watching as Jacob concentrated once again._

"_W__olf, snake, fang, magic, shadow, science, chaos, jokes" Jacob rattled off, looking expectantly at Jack, who was slowly nodding his head as he listened to his son._

"_Yup, like that. Now all we have to do is think up a name that has got something to do with the things you said" the Clown Prince of Crime told his black and green-haired son._

"_How about…Snake Fang? Shadow Magician? Wolf Fang__? Chaos Fang? Chaos Shadow? Wolf shadow? Shadow Mage? Chaos Mage? Chaos Magician?" the blue and green-eyed boy started saying, ticking off each name on his fingers. Arriving at a dead end, the 9-year-old looked up at his father, obviously wanting an input of some sort._

"_Shadow Magician, Shadow Mage, Chaos Magician and Chaos Mage would fit you the most" Jack finally decided after silently contemplating each option his son had come up with._

_Shadow Magician or Shadow Mage would refer to him being a wizard, but also with the ability to control the shadows. The Clown Prince of Crime didn't know what the difference between magician and mage was but they meant the same thing in his mind, though, admittedly, mage did sound better. The same with chaos. The Joker grinned at that one – he had corrupted his son to a certain extent. Now Jacob thought of himself as much an Agent of Chaos as the Joker did. But it suited his son very well. Jacob's pranks always managed to cause chaos and that was without even blowing something up!_

"_I think that the most suitable name for you, m__y dear son, would be Chaos Mage" Jack finally said, observing his son's reaction._

_As of late, Jacob had become more unpredictable in his reactions and that frustrated the Joker slightly – he liked to be able to predict people's reactions. But it was also a challenge at the same time and this one was one, which he would accept with a huge smile on his face. Of course, that didn't make things easier. He watched as slowly a grin spread across Jacob's face and Jack found himself returning that grin – they had found a name._

"_Chaos Mage it is!" Jacob gleefully shouted before jumping up and doing a small victory dance._

"_But we are not finished yet, Jake!" Jack reminded his son who was still dancing._

"_What? Oh, yes, right! The costume!" the black and green-haired boy remembered, smacking himself on the forehead with one hand. _

_How could he forget something as important as that? He had been imagining different costumes for days now. Whilst it was true that a costume tended to depend on the person's name, it wasn't always like that. After finally having a proper supervillain name, the 9-year-old already knew which costume idea to choose._

"_It seems that you already know what you want to wear" Jack stat__ed, a teasing tone to his voice as he noticed the smile on his son's face._

"_Well, I was thinking about black, baggy pants, black army boots with a dark purple trim, a black belt with two dark purple lines on the edges and with a dark silver buckle in the shape of a dragon with spread wings, a black poet shirt with dark purple designs along the left side and, to top it all off, a black cloak with a hood and which has dark purple flame designs on the edges. I'll just wear a simple black bandana over my eyes, since the hood will be hiding most, if not my entire face" the excited black and green-haired boy described the costume he had in mind to his father. _

_The Clown Prince of Crime thought about his son's costume. It was certainly a good idea. There seemed to be enough space to comfortably move about, so the design was okay. The colours were very appropriate too – chaos was mainly black, and the dark purple would make everything more evil, more sinister. Darker. So, symbolically speaking, the costume was okay as well._

"_Any kinds of accessories?" Jack curiously inquired._

"_Yup. I intend to make the belt like the utility belt the Jedi use in Star Wars – it's just so damn practical with all of those pouches" Jacob replied, bouncing up and down in his seat. Apparently the excitement was getting to the boy._

"_Alright then. We have your villain name and your costume. But what about a calling card?" came the Joker's question. _

_ "Uh….__To be honest, I haven't got the slightest idea…um…how about…a dark grey card on which there is a huge black and purple flame with the letters "CM" in a dark, forest green colour in the middle?" the black and green-haired boy hesitantly proposed._

_ "Perfect. Couldn't have thought about a better design myself"__ Jack said whilst nodding his head, a silly grin stretched across his face. Soon an even wider grin adorned his son's face. It was time for Gotham to meet its newest supervillain!_

_End of Flashback_

Just as he was about to go over the memory of Jacob's first bank heist, the Joker was jolted from his thoughts by an explosion in the kitchen. Rolling his eyes, the blonde-haired man got up from his bed and went over into the kitchen to see the third member (fifth, if you counted Ophois and Wadjet) of his little family, Harley Quinn.

Harleen Quinzel had been interning at the Arkham Asylum and had become fascinated with him after he had been thrown in there after an encounter with Batman. He really hated that bat. He giggled slightly as he thought of his ultimate goal – make Batsy go batty. He silently laughed at his own pun **(?)** as he wrapped his arms around Harley and nuzzled her neck.

The former doctor of psychology giggled before throwing away the latest batch of unsuccessful cookies – she just couldn't cook. Jack rolled his eyes once more at seeing the burned objects on the platter and watched as they fell into the trashcan with a loud and heavy "thump". Thankfully, Jacob and he could cook better than Harley.

Where was he? Ah, yes, she had volunteered to "analyze" him – the Joker snorted – as if they could do _**that**_ – and had fallen in love with him during their sessions. She had even helped him escape form the asylum a few times. After being badly beaten by Batman and sent on another one of his "visits" to Arkham she had become very angry, donned on a black and red harlequin jester costume, taken on the name Harley Quinn and had become his side-kick and lover.

Jacob had been very skeptical about her at first, what with being 10 years old and very suspicious of anyone joining their little family, and hadn't trusted her in the beginning at all. After 3 or 4 weeks, though, they had finally managed to establish an understanding and Jacob had finally accepted her. Harley was now like a mother for Jacob and the black and green-haired boy loved her just as much as he loved Jack.

After briefly telling his lover to stop trying to cook – she would, of course, never listen to him and continue – the Clown Prince of Crime went back to his room and lay back down on his bed. Today was one of the few days when he allowed himself to rest and he intended to make the most of it.

Now, where had he stopped down memory lane? Ah, yes, he remembered – Jacob's first bank heist…

_**Harry Potter x Batman**_

I hope you enjoyed reading this chapter.^_^

_**Ophois**_ is another name for the Ancient Egyptian wolf god, _**Wepwawet**_. As you have probably noticed, my dear readers, I am very interested in and fascinated by Ancient Egyptian culture. Especially Ancient Egyptian religion.^_^

Also, just so you know, all of my information about Harley Quinn comes from Wikipedia. If anyone knows anything else about her – like anything behaviour specific – then please tell me.^_^

Well, I hope you enjoyed reading this chapter. Please leave a review!^_^


	5. Chapter 5: Bank heist, Batman and Arkham

Hi People!^_^

Well, here is chapter 5! I hope you'll enjoy reading it.^_^

Please leave a nice little review at the end! I'd really appreciate it.^_^

_**Harry Potter x Batman**_

_**Chapter 5: Bank heist, Batman and Arkham**_

_Flashback_

_ Everything was running as usual in one of Gotham's many banks. As usual, at least, until a huge explosion rocked the entire building and a good chunk of one of the walls was blown away, littering the bank's floor with rubble. The huge cloud of dust hung for a few seconds in the air before it slowly started dissipating, revealing two people standing in the new "doorway" of the bank. Those who were standing up after being thrown onto the floor by the explosion immediately sat down again at the sight of the two figures._

_One of the two people was well-known to all of the people of Gotham and was a frightening sight, what with his garishly white face and painted-on red smile – the Joker. There wasn't a person in all of Gotham who didn't know of the clown with the purple suit, purple pants and dark green vest. The other person, however, was unknown. _

_He, for it was definitely a he, was only half-way as tall as the Clown Prince of Crime but exuded an aura of danger and menace, which frightened the Gothamites __**(?) **__even more. After all, anyone would run for the hills, if an unknown figure in a black cloak suddenly appeared, surrounded by swirling shadows and with two, glowing, turquoise eyes looking at them from underneath a hood that swallowed the entire face into darkness. _

_ "Weeelll hellooo, ladies and gentleman! Mind if we barge in? After all, there is a vault with our name on it, waiting for us to just open it up!" the Joker joyously exclaimed whilst stepping into the bank, the cloaked figure laughing slightly as it following him._

_ The mysterious figure's eerily glowing eyes passed over each and very single person on the floor and the clerks behind the counters. Every single person in the bank knew that there was something unnatural about those eyes and shivers ran down their spines as their own eyes met the new supervillain's – they felt as if those turquoise eyes were looking right into their very soul. Several people fainted and the Clown Prince of Crime's partner let out a slightly insane giggle. _

_ "I think we scared them to death" the figure lightly commented._

_ "T-take the money and leave! Just don't kill us!" a terrified clerk shouted, throwing an entire bag of money over the counter._

_The mystery figure's eyes zoomed in on the clerk that had shouted this and the trembling man suddenly froze in his place. Walking over towards the clerk, the hooded figure took out some kind of sword from underneath its cloak and held the blade to the trembling man's neck. The man's eyes widened._

"_Not everything that counts can be counted and not everything that can be counted counts. You just managed to loose something from the first category. Do you know what it is?" the figure curiously asked the clerk _

"_N-n-no" the clerk stuttered._

"_Your life" the figure replied before cutting the man's neck at the side._

_Wiping of__f the small trail of blood on the sword's blade, the figure sheathed it and took out a car from a pocket somewhere inside his cloak, laying it on the counter. The figure then went back over to where it had been standing, taking the bag full of money that the clerk had previously thrown over the counter. Turning around he looked at the shocked people on the floor. They were actually more then shocked when the newest supervillain spoke – that was the voice of a child!_

"_You know, I've always thought that the fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears" the mystery figure informed them whilst the Jok__er stepped out of the vault, three bags slung over his shoulder._

_The shadows that had until then tamely swirled about the mystery figure's feet suddenly began to speed up as the Joker reached his partner in crime and put a hand on the figure's shoulder, grinning that maniacal smile of his._

"_See, there is no risk of accident for someone who's dead" the cloaked supervillain finished whilst taking out a small detonator from somewhere._

"_Yup, and you should be glad that we are giving you this beeeautifull chance of having an accident-free life" the Joker cheerfully said before pushing the detonation button and disappearing in an explosion of darkness, along with the new mystery villain. Before that happened, though, a few more walls exploded._

_End of Flashback_

Oh, how he had been proud of his son! The papers on the next day had summed up the result of their bank heist. The Joker clearly recalled the exact words – how couldn't he? After all, his son had done his first bank heist practically on his own and all Jack had had to do was get the money out.

All in all, the entire bank was destroyed, 10 people had died and another 28 had been severely injured. The number of casualties was so low only because the bank had been one of the smaller, more insignificant ones. But that was what had made it so perfect for Jacob's first bank heist.

Jack had also agreed with Jacob on doing it during the day-light hours – wouldn't want to encounter Batman on his first major crime, now, would he? However, that particular meeting would have to, naturally, happen at some point sooner or later and it happened two months after Jacob's first bank heist. Oh, he would never forget it and neither would the Batman, he was very certain of that.

_Flashback_

_ Jacob was waiting for his father to get out of the jewelry store he had decided to rob that night, pouting slightly under his hood – why couldn't he participate in the robbery? The slightly angry 9-year-old watched as the Joker ran out of the store and to the ladder, which wou__ld lead him up to the rooftop on where Jacob was currently standing._

_That was when he heard it – the sound of something whooshing above his head and landing right behind him. Going on pure instinct, the black and green-haired boy ducked and was happy to see that he had been right – a punch had been aimed at his head. Turning around quickly, Jacob wasn't surprised to find the Batman standing there._

_Using his own fighting style, the 9-year-old successfully landed a hit on Batman's chest, quickly superpowering it with his magic and sending "the bat" flying into the air by a few feet. After a short spar, where the caped crusader got a sound beating and Jacob avoided any and all attacks, both opponents stopped, panting slightly from the fight. _

"_Well, well, well, if it ain't the big, bad Battyman himself" the blue and green-eyed boy joyous__ly exclaimed._

"_And you must be the Joker's new partner in crime. What's your name?" the dark knight demanded, his eyes carefully watching the defensive stance Gotham's newest supervillain had taken. He had been startled when he had heard a child's voice come from under the hood and had been shocked that the boy – for it was obviously a boy – had not only completely avoided his attacks but also returned them with three times more force._

"_Oh yeah, right. You people still haven't figured out my initials. I forgot that. Well, allow me to introduce myself – I am the Chaos Mage" the young boy replied, waving his arms about and making a theatrical bow, obviously mocking him._

"_You know, I've always been curious about something – why do you fight us villains?" the Chaos Mage inquired, cocking his head to one side. Despite the fact that Batman knew this was a villain, he couldn't help but think how cute the cloaked and hooded young boy looked like that._

"_To prevent crime__ and fight injustice" came Batman's determined answer. Gotham's newest supervillain snorted at that._

"_L__ike war" the young boy said._

"_What do you mean?" the superhero asked, obviously confused._

"_You can't simultaneously prevent and prepare for war – the same goes for crime and injustice. You can't simultaneously prevent injustice and prepare to fight it. It's absolutely contradictory and that is also the reason why we win and you loose" Jacob calmly explained before hearing someone clap. Turning around he spotted his father getting up from__ the ledge he had been sitting on and approaching him._

"_Well said, C.M. See, Batsy, that's why you'll never stop us. So now, we bid you farewell. Ta__ ta!" the Clown Prince of Crime happily said, laughing along with his son at the dumfounded look on Batman's face before both of them disappeared in the shadows. _

_End Flashback_

Oh, that had been a fun night. His son had soundly beaten Batboy and had given him a small lecture that the Clown Prince of Crime was sure the superhero wouldn't forget anytime soon. Of course, taunting the caped crusader like that would sooner or later come back at them and it had – in the form of Arkham. Cursed tranquilizing darts! They must have held at least enough to calm down an elephant and Jack could imagine that was a hard task.

Jack had been afraid that Arkham would have a bad effect on his son, even though he kept telling the black and green-haired boy that it was more like a small vacation for him whenever he went there. But it turned out that Arkham wasn't a place that Jacob feared. It was rather Arkham that feared Jacob.

_Flashback_

_ Jack watched as his son smiling, almost grinning, across from him as the GPD moved them to Arkham. They hadn't even had the courtesy of interrogating them first. To the Joker's amusement, his son was insulted by that._

_ "You'd think that when a new supervillain shows up in town you'd like to find out a bit about them" the black and green-haired boy had complained._

_ As the van they were being moved in slowly came to a stop Jack smiled at his son as he looked at him. He wondered how the 10-year-old would react to the asylum. If he had to guess, he would say that his son would think it was a blast, judging by the grin the blue and green-eyed boy had on his face._

_ They had been assigned in opposite cells and Jack couldn't have been happier – he most definitely wanted to know how Jacob's first session went when it happened. He scoffed slightly at the thought of these sessions – didn't these people ever learn? Sessions were useless in his case and he was more than certain that the same applied to Jacob. He was the son of the Joker, after all._

_ Jacob looked around the room two of the people at the asylum had led him into. He was disgusted by it. Where the heck did the colour go? The room was sooo white – totally not his style! The only items within the room itself were two chairs that didn't look very comfortable and a table. All of them were wooden, of course. Pity._

_ Just as Jacob sat down on one of the two chairs – he wasn't going to stand around all day long in that room! – the door o__pened and a woman in a typical white doctor's coat came in. She had long, brown hair that was tied up in a high ponytail and was wearing a pair of glasses. The traditional doctor look. Her name tag read "Muriel Sanders". Sitting down on the chair opposite of Jacob, the psychiatrist looked at the black and green-haired boy above her black-framed glasses._

_ "You __**are**__ aware that you are the youngest patient currently in Arkham asylum, right?" she inquired._

_ "Yup" was Jacob's short reply. What should he do? Maybe play a little mind game? It certainly seemed in order. Smiling a pleasant smile, the blue and green-eyed boy watched as the doctor wrote something down on her notepad._

_ "Alright then. Let's begin. What's your real name?"_

_ "Shouldn't you know it?" Jacob quickly replied._

_ "We couldn't find you in any database in the world, so no"_

_ "I see" the young boy mused, wondering why, at the very least, Harry Potter didn't show up. He had, after all, been to school for one year. _

_ "Well? What is your real name?"_

_ "John Talbott with a double "t" at the end" Jacob calmly told the psychiatrist. On the inside he was laughing – as if he was going to give his __**real**__ name to her!_

_ "It says here that you go by the name of Chaos Magician – why?"_

_ "I don't know. Ask__ the Joker – he chose it"_

_ "Do you know the reason why you are here?" Muriel inquired._

_ "__Look, I do not know why I am even here, Mrs…Sanders. They just brought me in – without even an interrogation at the police station. How rude is that? No, I am absolutely lost as to the reason why I am in this lunatic asylum" Jacob smoothly lied, using what remained of his British accent to make him sound more sincere._

_Looking carefully at the psychiatrist with a raised eyebrow, the black and green-haired boy was pleased __to see that his plan seemed to work – the woman was frowning and quickly looking through her notes. Yes, this was the first stage of his just-made plan – make her doubt her notes first. Then, if he was right, she would ask about his life up to that point. Of course, just like with the name, he would lie about it._

_ "Um…I don't understand – they said that you were as crazy as the Joker"_

_ "I'm not. No. I. Am. Not" he firmly told her._

_ Jacob was scowling on the inside – he hated it when people said his father was crazy or insane. He was neither! Insanity is when a person did the same thing over and over again, expecting different results each time. Crazy…well, a crazy person was just slightly mentally unstable but could be "healed". Insane and crazy people could be rehabilitated and introduced back into society. _

_Psychotic people, though, like his father, could not. Jacob wondered briefly if he also fit in the psychotic category. According to his definitions, he certainly wasn't crazy or insane, yet he wasn't normal either. Mentally shrugging, the black and green-haired boy decided that he was at least partially psychotic. Turning back to the psychiatrist, the almost 10-year-old boy prepared himself for the next question. _

_ "Tell me how you ended up with the Joker, Mr. Talbott"_

_ "Certainly, Mrs. Sanders. It all started with my parents. Or rather with my father. See, he was working at a drill company. We lived in England at the time. However, what we didn't know was that he was also stealing a bit from the company. The company was owned by someone in the mob, here, in Gotham. They found out about the thievery and it was not long before they managed to trace it back to my father. They hired the Joker to kill him and so the Joker came, killed my father and proceeded to kill my mother. It was only thanks to my small treasure trove of jokes that I lived. See, he decided to take me with him and so he did and that is how I ended up with him. That happened when I was 7 and now I am 9. So, as you can see, I didn't have a choice in whether I wanted to commit crimes or not. I am 100% innocent" the black and green-haired child smoothly told "his story" to the psychiatrist, who had tears in her eyes and was furiously writing something on her notepad. Looking up at him, Mrs. Sanders was certain that this boy's place was not in this asylum._

_ Muriel Sanders felt__ very sorry for the strange boy in front of her. It wasn't that the boy himself was strange – it was only his hair and eyes. Was he even born with that colour in his eyes or was he wearing some type of contact lenses? It didn't really matter, though, because she, Muriel Alexandra Sanders, was determined to get this boy out of Arkham. He still had a bright future ahead of him and didn't deserve to waste it in one of Arkham Asylum's many cells. They were for mentally deranged people and to her eyes this boy was obviously perfectly sane._

_ Walking out of the room, the doctor of psychiatry was determined to achieve her self-imposed mission of getting the kid out of there as soon as possible. After going up a few staircases – they really needed to get an elevator – the doctor found herself standing in front of the director __**(?)**__ of the asylum. Taking a deep breath, the brown-haired psychiatrist knocked and upon hearing a clear "Enter" pushed open the double-doors and went into the director's office, firmly closing the doors shut once she was inside._

_ After more than half-an-hour of discussing it, the director finally gave in and agreed to let "John Talbott" go. But only if after another 5 sessions the black and green-haired boy's statement of being innocent was maintained. To that point, the examiner of "John" would be different every single day and the results of each session would be discussed, together, at the end of the week._

_ Jack waited patiently for his son to return and when he did he couldn't help but return the grin on his son's face. Sc__ooting closer to the bars, the Joker looked expectantly at Jacob and raised an eyebrow._

_ "Well?" Jack eagerly inquired._

_ "Hook, line and sinker" was the only thing the grinning black and green-haired boy said, making the Clown Prince of Crime break out in one of his __well-known uncontrollable laughing fits. He was so proud of his son!_

_ Over the next 5 days Jacob was questioned by 5 different psychiatrists and all of them were confused. Maybe it was because Jacob would change from being perfectly sane on one day to partially psychotic on the next. Or it could also have been the fact that he invented a new story for every psychiatrist. This brought many laughs out of the Joker and some of the other supervillains when they were in the recreational room and the blue and green-eyed boy was telling them about the sessions._

_ After spending a week at the asylum, the blue and green-eyed boy became bored. So on his 8__th__ night there he used his shadow powers to get out of his cell and walked around the asylum, mapping it out. Really, how long would they have to stay in that almost entirely colourless place? There was nothing fun to do. At all. _

_ It wasn't long after that that the GBN (__**G**__otham __**B**__roadcasting __**N**__etwork) announced the mysterious escape of the Joker and the Chaos Mage._

_End of Flashback_

Jack rubbed his head and closed his eyes at the sudden headache. The irritated Clown Prince of Crime looked up with a small glare at the colourful ceiling of his room.

"Damn you, authoress. Don't you know that so many flashbacks in such a short period of time can cause a nasty headache!" he muttered darkly under his breath, still glaring at the ceiling. Suddenly he heard a small scream from the kitchen and slowly got up he let out a long and heavy sigh. He had told Harley to stay away from the stove and any other part of the kitchen, really.

When he stepped into the kitchen (again) the Joker was met with a funny sight – Harley was standing on a chair, broom in hand, and was swatting said broom at the ceiling. Looking with an amused smile on his face at what she was trying to beat up, Jack's eyebrows shot up – what the heck was an owl doing inside the apartment? Not to mention that it was day, not night, and owls were nocturnal creatures. Upon looking more closely at the owl, the blond-haired man discovered that the owl was carrying a letter in its talons. What the heck was going on?

_**Harry Potter x Batman**___

Well, I hope you enjoyed chapter 5.^_^

Please leave nice little review!^_^


	6. Chapter 6: Letter, Visit and Answer

Hi People!^_^

Well, here is chapter 6. Enjoy reading it.^_^

_**IMPORTANT:**_ The scene with the tuna fish was entirely _Seneth_'s idea.

So, enjoy chapter 6 and please leave a nice little review at the end! I'd really appreciate it.^_^

_**Harry Potter x Batman**_

_**Chapter 6: Letter, Visit and Answer**_

Jack could not believe his eyes – who the heck used _owls_, of all creatures, to deliver _mail_? Mentally shrugging, the Joker held out his hand a bit awkwardly, wondering if what he was trying to do would work. To his surprise it did. Better than he expected, actually. In fact, the poor owl shot towards him like a rocket. The Clown Prince of Crime laughed – Harley had managed to terrify the animal quite a lot!

"Hey, dad? What's an owl doin' sitting on your arm?" a boy's voice curiously inquired, making the blond-haired man turn around.

There, standing in the doorway of his room, was his son. Jacob hadn't changed all that much during the past 4 years, though the major difference between now and then was in the build of his body – it was athletic now, not scrawny, and the 11-year-old had grown quite a bit as well. He now stood at 4.6 feet **(?)**.

"Well, strangely enough, it seems that this owl is carrying a letter. I wonder for who it is, though…" the Joker mused lightly, his steel blue eyes going to the letter tied to one of the eagle owl's feet. Using his left hand, the Clown Prince of Crime quickly untied it from the owl's foot and looked at the address. His eyebrows shot practically into his hairline.

_**Mr. Jacob Napier**_

_**Second bedroom to the right**_

_**Top-most apartment**_

_**Cross Avenue**_

_**Gotham, USA**_

"Oh look! It's for me!" the black and green-haired boy happily exclaimed whilst taking the letter from his still wide-eyed father and eagerly opening it. Reading quickly through it, the slightly psychotic 11-year-old giggled before clearing his throat in an important manner. The Joker rolled his eyes slightly – his son liked theatrics.

"It says:

Dear Mr. Napier,

We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry (Scotland, Great Britain). Please find enclosed a list of necessary supplies and equipment.

Term begins September 1st. We await your owl by no later than August 3rd.

Yours sincerely,

_Minerva McGonnagal_

Minerva McGonnagal

Deputy Headmistress

Everyone in the room was silent for a few moments before suddenly laughing. Jacob was rolling on the floor, Jack was holding his sides and tears were streaming from his eyes and Harley was holding onto the kitchen counter after getting down from the chair.

"Oh, that's a good one!" the Clown Prince of Crime said, wiping the tears of joy from his eyes and looking at his still chuckling son.

When everyone calmed down, they went into the living room – they had to discuss this new development. On the off chance that it wasn't a prank – and the patiently waiting owl was a possible sign that it wasn't – then they would have to think about how they were going to answer that letter. Looking at his son, the Joker couldn't help but let a small giggle escape him. His son had something already in mind, if the grin on his face was any indication.

_**At **__**Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Scotland, Great Britain:**_

Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore was sitting behind the desk in his office at Hogwarts, drinking tee with his Deputy Headmistress, Minerva McGonnagal. The aged wizard let out a heavy sigh as he placed the cup back on his desk. This would have been the year that Harry Potter would have started Hogwarts, if the blasted boy hadn't suddenly disappeared into thin air.

Whilst the Hogwarts book of students didn't lie, that didn't mean that just because the boy's name was absent he had died. No, in fact, he, Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore, would bet his entire name and fortune that Harry Potter was still alive. After all, the boy's life stone had not cracked yet and was still pulsing. They were very useful things, life stones. He had made one for Harry potter and Neville Longbottom after hearing the prophecy. The fact that the boy's name had disappeared from the list could mean only two things – one: the boy had lost all of his magic but was still alive; or two: the boy had been magically adopted by someone and had, as a result, changed his name. In the Headmaster's opinion, the second option was more likely than the first.

Minerva McGonnagal was thinking almost along the same lines as the Headmaster. Well, almost. Alright, she was thinking not at all along the same lines as the ancient (and he most certainly was ancient) wizard in front of her, although the subject of their thoughts was one and the same – Harry James Potter.

Minerva could hardly believe that the sweet little boy of James and Lily Potter was dead, or at the very least had vanished off of the face of the Earth. She had been slightly shocked by the appearance of their son, but those two-coloured eyes had seen straight through her soul and had immediately won her heart. The Scottish witch had a very faint hope that, somehow, the boy would appear for his first year of Hogwarts.

Suddenly both professors were startled out of their thoughts by an eagle owl's screech and they watched as the owl swerved down towards them. Landing on the Headmaster's desk, the tired owl dropped the letter it had been carrying in its beak and proceeded to unashamedly steal one of McGonnagal's infamous cinnamon cookies before flying back out of the open window.

Leaning forward in their seats, the two Transfiguration Masters looked at the address and saw a messy handwriting on it.

_**For the Headmaster and Deputy H**__**eadmistress of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry**_

Dumbledore carefully took the envelope and turning it around opened it. Suddenly he was engulfed in a cloud of green smoke. Coughing from the gas, the aged wizard breathed in some of it. McGonnagal watched with wide eyes what the reaction would be. To her complete shock, the Headmaster started chuckling, then giggling and then went out into a full-blown, seemingly unending laugh falling off of his chair in the process.

The Transfiguration Professor saw a slip of paper fall out of the envelope and land on the desk. Taking it into her hand, the Scottish woman's eyes widened at the words on it.

Dearest Headmaster and Deputy Headmistress,

The answer to this preposterous and ridiculous acceptance letter is no. No. NO. Two letters – N and O. NO.

I do hope that you understand this declination of your invitation and, just to make sure you don't have serious faces on after reading the news, I have taken the liberty of adding a bit of smiling, or rather laughing, gas to cheer you up – it's guaranteed to work!

Yours sincerely,

Jacob Napier

P.S.: the laughing should stop in 15 minutes or so. If it doesn't, then I suggest you go to the nearest hospital. After all, the news in this letter is almost enough to die from!

Beneath that was the drawing of a laughing face. Wasting no time, the Deputy Headmistress took a hold of the laughing Headmaster, went to the fireplace and, using the floo network, brought herself and Dumbledore to St. Mungoes – she wasn't about to risk Albus Dumbledore's life and allow him to die because of something as ridiculous as excess of laughing. How would that sound in the papers?

_**2 hours later… **_

Tracking down where the student lived was easy. Getting there – not. It took time and not to mention money to get an international portkey made. The benefit was that it would lead you to the nearest, unnoticeable spot of where you wanted to go. Unfortunately for the two Hogwarts teachers, that was in an alley. Unlike normal portkeys, international ones took a long time to get used to. As a result, both Dumbledore and McGonnagal found themselves falling down face first…in a puddle.

After getting up and cleaning themselves, the two teachers looked up ahead and saw the block where the student that had managed to gas Dumbledore – Jacob Napier – lived. It was easy to get through the entrance door. Now all they had to do was climb the stairs…to the very top…the many, many, many stairs…

After a tiring half-hour climb up the stairs – they were thankful that they had training with Hogwarts' stairs – the two wizards found themselves sitting down in the living room of the family of Jacob Napier. The moment both of them entered the apartment and saw a small black and green-haired and blue and green-eyed boy already sitting in the living room, both wanted to cry out in joy. Both for different reasons, naturally, but they refrained from doing that. Sitting down on the couch, McGonnagal and Dumbledore shivered slightly as the black and green-haired boy's two-coloured eyes looked into their own.

"Who are you?" the Joker questioned them after sitting down next to his son.

"Minerva McGonnagal and this is Albus Dumbledore. We come on behalf of the letter Jacob Napier sent us" she replied.

"I see" the Clown Prince of Crime said, intrigued that that letter earlier wasn't a prank as he had thought. He wouldn't show his slight surprise, though.

"Oh, so Hogwarts is real? Interesting. Ah well, the answer is still "no", Mrs. McGonnagal" Jacob happily informed her whilst looking at the obviously struggling to say something Dumbledore. Cocking his head to one side in a sign of curiosity, the black and green-haired boy asked the Scottish woman "Why hasn't he spoken yet?"

"Well, that laughing gas you sent was powerful. The healers – doctors in your world – ordered the Headmaster not to speak. He is still suffering from random bouts of laughing" the Transfiguration professor explained, frowning disapprovingly on the inside when she observed Jacob's happy face at the news.

"Truth be told, it wasn't all that powerful. In fact, that was the least powerful I could make the gas. After all, SmileX is meant to be lethal" the blue and green-eyed boy admitted and McGonnagal was startled – the boy had invented this? And this laughing gas had a more fatal version?

"May I ask you a few things?" the Transfiguration professor softly inquired whilst looking at the boy sitting across of her. The resemblance was too great for the boy not to be _**him**_.

"Yup" Jacob happily replied, making McGonnagal start to believe that the black and green-haired boy was slightly hyperactive at least, what with being almost constantly cheerful ever since they had arrived.

"Did you once live in England?"

"Yeah, I did"

"Somewhere in Surrey with a family of three, perhaps?"

"Yes" the blue and green-eyed boy replied, his eyes narrowing slightly. Where was that witch going with all of her questions?

"Was it a family by the name "Dursley"?" Minerva asked, barely containing her excitement. This answer would prove to her that this was or wasn't the missing Harry Potter.

"Yes, but-the-Dursleys-are-dead-now" Jacob answered in a sing-song voice.

"Oh, Harry, you have no idea how long we have been searching for you" McGonnagal told him, tears starting to run down her cheeks.

She was horrified that he would be happy about the Dursleys death but she was too happy to have finally found the son of Lily and James Potter after 4 years of searching. The middle-aged (for a witch, anyway) woman would have gladly embraced the 11-year-old boy, if she hadn't been startled when the black and green-haired child's entire demeanor abruptly changed. If she hadn't been looking, she wouldn't have believed her eyes.

"Ah, so you knew where I lived and who I once was" the blue and green-eyed boy calmly stated, his voice void of any emotion "This just supports the answer that I gave you. It is still "no", Mrs. McGonnagal" Jacob finished and the Transfiguration teacher shivered – either the temperature in the room had just dropped significantly or she was very afraid. Gathering her Gryffindor courage, the Scottish woman decided to continue her mission of persuading Harry to go to Hogwarts.

"But Mr. Potter – " she began but was cut off.

"No! Harry James Potter doesn't exist anymore. In fact, he hasn't existed for the past 4 years. I am Jacob John Napier and I don't need to go to your stupid school – I can control my powers just fine. Nor am I ever going back to England" the irritated young wizard firmly told her, leaving no space for arguments.

Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore could no longer hold his words in. He had been silent for the past 2, almost 3 hours and he had had enough. He could not miss the opportunity to get Harry Potter back to England. He would simply have to place him with a Wizarding Family – maybe the Weasleys? Yes, they were a good choice. But first he had to get the brat out of here and back to England.

"You have no choice in this, Mr. Potter" Dumbledore determinedly told the young boy, standing up from where he had been sitting "You will follow us back to England where you will be placed with another family. You will also remove those ridiculous marks on your cheeks and you will obey everything I say" he forcefully said, a small laugh escaping him after that. Damn that laughing gas! When his eyes met those of the Joker and Jacob, the aged wizard froze. That look the two had in their eyes…

"Very poor choice of words, Mr. Dumbledore" the enraged blond-haired man informed the aged wizard before suddenly he took out a knife and dove at the old man, tackling him onto the floor.

McGonnagal looked up from where the two men were rolling around on the floor like children – you'd think someone like Dumbledore would be more mature – and saw that whereas the boy had previously been alone on the couch, he was now joined by a black wolf with eyes the same colour as his and by a black snake with dark, forest green eyes. The black and green-haired boy was clearly very angry. Standing up, the 11-year-old jumped and made a somersault over the Transfiguration teacher's head, landing in a defensive stance behind the armchair she was sitting in.

The fight was a long one, to say the least. Transfiguration wasn't doing McGonnagal any good as Jacob, true to his word, wielded his magic like a master. She saw the gleam in his eye and the grin on his face when he used his magic to banish her into one of the living room's walls. As she was getting up from where she had fallen, McGonnagal, as well as Jacob, witnessed an incredibly funny sight.

Harley had joined in on the fight at some point and now she had taken out a ridiculously big tuna fish from somewhere – how does she pull ridiculously huge objects from out of thin air? – and, after making sure that the Joker was at a safe distance, whacked the slightly dazed headmaster in the face with it, causing the aged wizard to fall face first on the red and black carpet.

"That's for trying to harm my Mista J!" the former doctor of psychiatry informed the, to her disappointment, currently slightly deaf headmaster.

Silence reigned for about 5 seconds before both the Clown Prince of Crime and Jacob burst out laughing and even McGonnagal had to exert supreme control over herself to not laugh along with them. She had to admit, that was the most ridiculous thing she had ever seen but she would cherish this memory forever.

However, the fight soon continued and McGonnagal got cornered. Seeing a beam of bright, bluish-white light racing towards her, the transfiguration teacher saw no other choice than to transform into her Animagus form – a tabby cat. To the Scottish woman's utter surprise ad shock, her opponent – a mere 11-year-old child – changed into a black and dark, forest green-furred wolf and ran towards her. What followed could be described as a typical cat and dog chase.

Until the annoyed cat…uh, sorry,_ teacher_ decided she had had enough and changed back into a human. What she hadn't counted on, however, was for the black and green-haired boy's snake to wrap itself around her arms, trapping them at her side, and to bare it's fangs at her throat. Naturally, McGonnagal stopped in her tracks and stared in fear at the black-scaled snake. She could practically feel death's hand close around her.

Before she could even blink, the reptile had been replaced by glowing, yellow chains and the snake had slithered over to the black and green-haired boy. Minerva felt the hairs on her neck stand up when Jacob hissed at the snake and to the Transfiguration teacher's further shock the snake actually hissed back at him! Harry Potter was a Parselmouth?

Turning around, the blue and green-eyed boy grinned when he saw that his father and Harley were tying Dumbles up as well. Summoning him in a very Jedi-like way, the black and green-haired boy put the old man right next to the Scottish woman. Once that was done he looked at his father and grinned. They didn't know it, or maybe they did, but the two Hogwarts teachers were secretly scared by the small family.

"Ya know, dad, I had a change of heart. After seeing Mrs. McGonnagal do those things with her magic – transforming objects – I decided that I want to go to that school" Jacob suddenly announced, his grin, if possible, getting even bigger.

"Um….alright, Mr. Potter, we – " McGonnagal began, eager to get out of this apartment as soon as possible.

"Napier" the still grinning and very joyous 11-year-old interjected.

"What?" came the Scottish woman's confused reply.

"Napier. My name is Jacob John Napier. Remember what I said before – Harry James Potter doesn't exist anymore" he explained, the Transfiguration teacher quickly nodding in consent at his words. She noted to herself to not tell any of the staff that Jacob Napier was in reality Harry Potter – for protection. Not Jacob's, but theirs.

"Yes, well, as I said, Mr. Napier, we will be expecting you on September 1st. The supplies can be bought in any magical district and...um...Platform 9 ¾ is between platforms nine and ten at King's Cross station. Now, if you would be so kind as to free us, we will be on our way" she quickly finished.

"Certainly!" the very happy black and green-haired boy exclaimed before snapping his fingers and freeing McGonnagal from her bonds. He then turned to Dumbledore and, using a knife he had pulled out of nowhere, cut the ropes holding the ancient wizard.

When Minerva McGonnagal and Albus Dumbledore returned to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry they both wanted to cry. Why, oh why, had they decided to not leave that child alone? They had invited a little monster to Hogwarts! Though McGonnagal was, at least, pleased to note that he was excellent at wielding his magic without a wand and would probably get high grades in all classes.

Back in Gotham a certain trio of pranksters was going through the city with Ophois leading them somewhere. Jacob had asked his wolf familiar to look for any magical trails, like the ones of Dumbles and Minnie – as the black and green-haired boy had taken to calling them – and to lead them to where they were the strongest. Their search ended when Ophois stopped in front of what appeared to be a closed down mall. Grinning, the blue and green-eyed 11-year-old took a hold of Harley and Jack and stepped through the abandoned mall's doorway.

_**Harry Potter x Batman**_

Well, I hope you enjoyed reading this chapter!^_^

Please leave a nice little review!^_^


	7. Chapter 7: Shopping and Train

Hi People!^_^

Well, here is chapter 7! I'm sorry for the slight delay, but there was a power shortage today…^_^'…Thankfully, it didn't last too long.^_^

Enjoy reading it and please leave a nice little review at the end!^_^

_**Harry Potter x Batman**_

_**Chapter 7: Shopping and Train**_

Jacob looked around, stunned at the sight that met his and his father's and Harley's eyes. An entire shopping district appeared before them and people. There were hundreds of people there. Some were dressed in what Jacob would call the traditional wizard or witch look, with pointy hats and robes. Others wore what the black and green-haired boy called normal clothes – clothes that people in Gotham and around the world wore everyday. Owls flew overhead, carrying letters or returning from their messenger errands.

Thinking back to the way that Dumbles and Minnie had dressed when they had dropped by unexpectedly, the 11-year-old wizard had expected the shopping district to be as equally stuck in time as the clothes were. But what he saw were absolutely normal, modern shops. All in all it was a stunning sight.

The blue and green-eyed boy quickly scanned the list of supplies that had arrived with the first letter and that he had taken with them on this shopping trip. He was skeptical about some of the items on the list, but shrugged – with magic anything was possible.

UNIFORM: 

First year students are required to have: 

Three sets of plain works robes (black)  
One plain pointed hat (black) for day wear  
One pair of protective gloves (dragon hide or similar)  
One winter cloak (black, silver fastenings)

Please note that all pupils' clothes should carry name tags.

COURSE BOOKS 

All students should have a copy of each of the following:

The Standard Book of Spells (Grade 1) by Miranda Goshawk  
A History of Magic by Bathilda Bagshot  
Magical Theory by Adalbert Waffling  
A Beginner's Guide to Transfiguration by Emeric Switch  
One Thousand Magical Herbs and Fungi by Phyllida Spore  
Magical Drafts and Potions by Arsenius Jigger  
Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them by Newt Scamander  
The Dark Forces: A Guide to Self-Protection by unknown author

OTHER EQUIPMENT 

1 wand  
1 cauldron (pewter, standard size 2)  
1 set glass or crystal phials  
1 telescope  
1 set brass scales

Students may also bring an owl OR a cat OR a toad.

PARENTS ARE REMINDED THAT FIRST YEARS ARE NOT ALLOWED THEIR OWN BROOMSTICKS!

"Alright then. Let's first check out their bank!" the Joker merrily proposed after reading through the list of supplies along with Harley. Jacob chuckled – of course the bank was their first stop.

Now, if anyone thought that Gringotts was a wizarding bank that could only be found in Britain, then they were wrong. Gringotts had many branches, all spread throughout the world. Therefore it should be no surprise that there also was a Gringotts bank in the Gotham City wizarding district. Unlike the one in Britain, though, it wasn't made out of stone and slowly crumpling, but metal like any other bank in Gotham. However, the warning on the bank's doors still remained the same.

Both Jack and Jacob were very amused by it when they passed through the door.

"Do you think that's a challenge?" the black and green-haired boy innocently inquired, a grin on his face as he indicated the poem.

_Enter, stranger, but take heed__  
Of what awaits the sin of greed,  
For those who take, but do not earn,  
Must pay most dearly in their turn.  
So if you seek beneath our floors  
A treasure that was never yours,  
Thief, you have been warned, beware  
Of finding more than treasure there._

"Weeelll, I don't know. What do you think, son?" the blond-haired man replied, an equally big grin on his face.

"Definitely a challenge" Jacob answered, nodding his head slightly as they entered the bank. And promptly stopped in their tracks.

"What are those creatures?" Harley asked no one in particular whilst pointing at said creatures.

"Who cares? We need to go o a teller or something like that" the Joker told her, heading towards one of these creatures.

"We'd like to open an account here. Or rather he does" the Clown Prince of Crime told the still-unidentified creature, pointing towards his son.

"Certainly. If the young sir would place a drop of his blood on this paper, we will proceed to create a vault and key for him" the being instructed Jacob as the black and green-haired boy nonchalantly brought out a switchblade – his favorite one at that – and calmly cut his palm, watching as not just the required one drop of blood, but at the very least ten made their way down his hand and onto the slip of paper, making it glow for a few moments. The strange being frowned when words appeared on it.

"It seems that you already have a vault, young sir" the confused goblin (thought the trio of pranksters didn't know it was a goblin) informed them.

Tapping the piece of paper with one of his sharp nails, the paper glowed for a few moments once again before going back to its normal state. Upon closer inspection, though, two new words had appeared – _**Potter vault**_. The goblin's coal-black eyes widened as they read the words over and over again.

"I will inform Lord Ragnarok of this. If you would please wait here…" the still stunned goblin teller murmured before running into one of the many hallways.

Not even 15 minutes later the family of jokers was sitting in the office of the head goblin. Jacob had been thinking about the name of the goblin lord and grinned. Ragnarok was part of the Norse mythology and was a series of events, including a great battle that sunk the world into chaos, some of the important gods dying in the process. Perhaps the goblin lord could be a great ally…

"Gogglehook has informed me of the situation. Might I inquire, young sir, how you came to be ignorant of the existence of your vault?" the slightly old goblin asked the black and green-haired boy. Blue and green eyes looked at him.

"Well, Lord Ragnarok, I was never informed that I had a vault, despite being aware of my magic since I was a small boy" Jacob smoothly replied. He had told the truth and yet had at the same time lied. Oh, you just gotta love white lies.

"I see. Then your magical guardian, who turns out to be none other than the famous Albus Dumbledore, is at fault here and will be replaced as soon as he is arrested for the crime of withholding such important information from the heir of one of the oldest and most prominent houses in the Wizarding World" Lord Ragnarok sternly said, watching as the two goblins he had on standby took the scroll with the order for the arrest of Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore on it and scuttled out of his office.

"Wonderful news, Lord Ragnarok, but who will be my new magical guardian? That is, assuming I need one, of course" the black and green-haired 11-year-old hesitantly inquired, slightly afraid of getting someone on the same level of horribleness as Dumbles or the Dursleys.

"Well, were your parents able to see the abandoned mall-illusion before entering the district?" the head goblin questioned and after receiving nods from both Harley and the Joker he continued "Then both are eligible to become your new magical guardians" Lord Ragnarok finished.

"I'll be his new magical guardian" Jack immediately said. After a few minutes the blond-haired man smiled in satisfaction – he was now legally Jacob's magical guardian.

"Lord Ragnarok, I was wondering something – if Dumbles has stolen anything from my vault, then the money would be returned with a bit "extra", so to say, right?" Jacob inquired and the head goblin smiled at the nickname the boy had given the oh-so-almighty Leader of the Light. He liked the way the boy thought.

One hour later, the trio of pranksters left the bank with Wizarding Cards – close to the normal concept of Credit Cards – and with ridiculously large grins on their faces. They and Lord Ragnarok had made sure that Dumbledore would wake up to a nasty surprise the next day. Oh, if only they could see his face!

_**3 hours later…**_

The clothes had been easy to get. Madam Lafayette was really nice to Jacob and didn't even question his small change to the list of supplies – make the robes self-adjust as his body grew. He wasn't going to buy new ones every single year – it would too expensive. Well, adding that little extra "ability" to his new wizarding clothes did cost more than if he had just gotten the robes, but it was worth it. The books and other items were not that difficult to get either. Naturally the trio had also raided the joke shop and Jacob could only imagine the predicament Batsy would find himself in, in the foreseeable future. The buying of the wand, though, was the most interesting part.

The wand shop they had entered was, in contrast to the other shops, dark. It had that mysterious atmosphere in it and when the shopkeeper suddenly appeared – an elderly man named Alexander Blackwood – they were startled.

"Ah! New customers! May I presume it's for the young sir's first wand?" Mr. Blackwood politely inquired before receiving a nod from Jacob.

"First I have to ask this – do you wish to buy a preexisting wand or a custom-made one?" the man inquired.

"Custom, of course" Jacob happily replied.

What followed was a half-hour stay in the storage room where Jacob had to let his magic choose the 5 components for his wand – a type of wood, a solid core, a liquid core, a focus and a set of runes. The black and green-haired boy choose an 11 inch piece of the famous Tree of Ténéré, the fang of a shadow wolf, the venom of an Egyptian Asp (Jacob smiled when he found out what he had chosen for the solid and liquid cores), a dark emerald stone as a focus and the runes for chaos, destruction, joy and protection, as contradictory as they might have seemed. A small added bonus was the fact that the wand was keyed to Jacob's blood, so only he could use it.

The result was a beautiful 11 inch-long, black wand with intricate, Celtic designs carved into the handle. Mr. Blackwood told them that this had been by far the most powerful wand he had ever created. One of the more interesting things that the wandmaker told them was that since it was custom-made, the usual ministry tracking charms didn't apply to it. This meant that Jacob could use it without any repercussions.

They had almost an entire month to make preparations for Hogwarts and they planned to make the best use of that time…

_**September 1**__**st**__**, King's Cross, London, England, Great Britain:**_

The flight to England had been very boring and if his father hadn't brought some playing cards with him, then the black and green-haired boy was sure he would have died of boredom. Literally. After that they had gone to the wizarding district in London and they had been shocked by the huge difference between Diagon Alley and Malistaire Avenue. The wizards and witches here really _**were**_ stuck in the Middle Ages.

Finding platforms 9 and 10 on September 1st wasn't as difficult as Jacob had thought it would be and soon he, Jack and Harley were standing on Platform 9 ¾ in front of a red steam-engine **(?)** called "The Hogwarts Express". Most students had owls or cats and Jacob wondered if he would get into trouble for brining his familiars.

Getting onto the train, the black and green-haired boy easily found a compartment and promptly locked it with his magic. He had decided to only use his wand in classes and the rest of the time just his magic – it seemed much easier to just use his magic instead of focusing it through the wand. Not to mention more powerful. He could already do 1/5 of the spells in his course books without a wand. Sticking his head out of the window he looked at his father and Harley and grinned.

"I promise to contact you as soon as possible" he promised his slightly worried father. Oh, he wasn't showing on the outside that he was worried – that just wasn't his style. But his steel blue eyes clearly showed what he was really feeling.

"Don't forget to send us a souvenir!" Harley joyously exclaimed whilst clinging onto one of the Joker's arms.

"And you have to tell me about all of your encounters with Batsy!" the black and green-haired boy retorted. He really didn't want to miss anything. That's when the signal for the departure of the train rang through hidden platform.

"See ya later!" Jacob happily shouted before ducking back into the compartment and closing the window. So, what was he going to do during the train ride?

"Hey, you guys, do you have any idea what I could do?" he asked his familiars. He had used his magic to enable both of them to understand him and to understand each other 3 years ago. That made communicating with them a lot easier.

"You could look at the plans you and your parents created for when you are at Hogwarts" the black-scaled snake hissed in reply.

"Nah, I already know them by heart, Wadjet" the young boy replied, turning his two-coloured eyes towards Ophois and raising an eyebrow.

"Brother, why don't you just sleep?" the young wolf suggested. Ophois had taken to calling Jacob "brother" ever since the black and green-haired boy's first transformation into a wolf. A wolf that looked like the older brother of Ophois.

"Ya know, that ain't such a bad idea. But I am too awake now to fall back asleep. I will sleep later on, though" Jacob told his familiars, getting a pensive look on his face once more.

Suddenly he heard someone trying to open the compartment door in frustration and, after giving up on opening it that way, started knocking on one of the window panes. Raising his eyebrow, the black and green-haired boy snapped his fingers and the compartment door opened. A red-headed boy walked into the compartment and closed the door after himself, sitting down directly across from Jacob. The blue and green-eyed boy didn't like this – who did this guy think he was?

"Ya know, I never said ya could sit down or come in, for that matter" Jacob growled out. Yes, growled. This startled the red-head, who had been looking out of the window, and he now looked angrily at him.

"I don't need to ask because I am the friend of Harry Potter" the red-head stated importantly, making Jacob raise an eyebrow. Turning to Ophois, the irritated black and green-haired boy growled at the wolf.

"Make this idiot get out of MY compartment" he ordered his wolf familiar. He usually didn't do that, but he was very angry right now.

His mood lightened somewhat as he watched Ophois snarl, growl and bite at the red-head, who looked outraged at his treatment.

"How dare your mangy mutt do this! Order him back!" the red-head said to Jacob.

"Oh? Why should I? And for your information, he isn't a "mangy mutt" – he is a shadow wolf and they are easily insulted. You just made yourself a target for his teeth" the blue and green-eyed 11-year-old informed the red-head before casually looking out the window at the quickly passing landscape. Two minutes later and Jacob was alone in the compartment once again.

To his major annoyance he had to deal with another prat like the red-head after that, only that one had blonde hair. At least he introduced himself…sort of. His name was Draco Malfoy and he had two students, also first years, with him who pretty much acted as his body guards. Gregory Crabbe and Vincent Goyle, as they were called, looked more like gorillas than humans and they probably had the mental capacity of a gorilla as well. Wadjet quickly took care of them – the moment they saw the Egyptian Asp raise herself up from Jacob's shoulders they made a run for it. Cowards. Every person he had met until then was cowardly and an arrogant prick who didn't know what was good for them.

One hour into the ride and Jacob was slightly startled out of his thoughts when someone knocked on the compartment door. Well, at least this one didn't rattle the door until they finally figured out it was locked. This one actually knocked first out of politeness. Jacob got up from his seat and went over to open the door.

"Hi, I am Blaise Zabini and this is Daphne Greengrass. Can we sit with you?" the black-haired boy asked Jacob.

"Sure. I'm Jacob Napier. I'm going to be a first year." he introduced himself before letting them in, closing the door and going over to his seat. He noticed that the two newcomers were looked curiously at Ophois and Wadjet. Already seeing the question in their eyes, the black and green-haired boy decided to answer it as quickly as possible. He just didn't like being asked questions. Only his uncle Riddler, Jack and Harley could ask him questions.

"These two are my familiars – Ophois and Wadjet. Ophois is a shadow wolf and Wadjet is an Egyptian Asp" the 11-year-old quickly explained "So, you two first years?" he asked them.

"Yup. Where do you come from? You don't have an accent that I can recognize" the girl, Daphne, inquired.

"Well, I was born and lived here until I was 7. Then my relatives were killed – Thank God – and I moved to America" Jacob answered.

"Relatives? What about your parents?" the dark-skinned boy, Blaise, asked.

"Died when I was one" the black and green-haired boy nonchalantly replied.

"Oh…Well, what house do you think you'll be sorted into?" Daphne asked, trying to veer away from the uncomfortable topic – uncomfortable for them, that is. Jacob was totally cool about it.

"House? What do you mean by "house"?" Jacob returned the question, truly confused.

"You mean you don't know?" Blaise replied with a question of his own, incredulity clear in his voice.

"Yup. First time I hear of it. So, what do you mean by house and I suppose it is safe to presume there is more than one?"

"Well, all students in Hogwarts are sorted in their first year into one of four houses – Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw and Slytherin. Each house values one specific character trait above all others. Gryffindor is for the courageous, Hufflepuff for the loyal, Ravenclaw for the intelligent and Slytherin for the cunning" Daphne quickly, but accurately explained and proceeded to watch Jacob shrug his shoulders.

"I don't really care. What about you?" he retorted. He really didn't care – he just wanted to learn anything and everything about transfiguration – that was just a skill too useful to just overlook.

"We don't care either and, thankfully, neither do our parents" Daphne said.

"I see. Hey, you guys know how to play poker?" the black and green-haired boy asked out of nowhere whilst taking out a normal deck of cards. Seeing them shake their heads, the blue and green-eyed 11-year-old took it upon himself to teach them how to play this particular card game and how to play it well.

This was how the three soon-to-be first years spent the rest of the ride – playing poker and other card games that Jacob found great joy in teaching to them. They had many good laughs. Especially once the trolley lady came by and Jacob ordered one of everything on the car. Opening the chocolate frogs was fun and collecting the cards too. However, combining Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans and card games with stakes in them was pure genius. Jacob was surprised just how many flavors the beans had. There was apple, glue, grass, acid, cauliflower, mud, varnish, earwax, pina colada, strawberry mousse, zucchini, wood and (Jacob's least favorite so far) Worcestershire sauce. There were many other flavors, of course, but these were the most peculiar ones Jacob had ever tasted. Turned out that wood wasn't as bad as he had originally thought.

When one of the prefects came by to tell them they were nearing Hogwarts, Blaise and Daphne got up and changed into their robes whilst Jacob just looked at them in amusement.

"Why aren't you changing, Jacob?" the black-haired girl curiously inquired.

"Simple. The letter said we had to own all of those clothes – it never actually said that we had to wear them" the black and green-haired boy replied as he watched the blurry form of a castle appear in the distance.

Looking at each other in shock, the two first years quickly changed back into their normal clothes and packed away the robes. They weren't comfortable to wear anyway. A few minutes later the train stopped.

"It's show time" Jacob happily announced, a grin on his face.

_**Harry Potter x Batman**_

Well, hope you enjoyed the chapter!^_^

I intended to be more descriptive with the shopping, more detailed, but I just couldn't think of anything specific when I got to that part…^_^'…

Please leave a review!^_^


	8. Chapter 8: Arrival, Surprise and Sorting

Hi People!^_^

Well, here is chapter 8. I hope you'll enjoy reading it!^_^

Please leave a nice little review at the end! I'd really appreciate it.^_^

_**Harry Potter x Batman**_

_**Chapter 8: Arrival**__**, Surprise and Sorting**_

Jacob got out of the Hogwarts Express along with all of the other students, Blaise and Daphne at his sides. He had somehow become the unofficial leader of their small group. It was pitch black outside except for the light that shone from the few lamps in the train station and the flame of a candle in a ….whatever those cage-like lamps were called. It was held by the hugest man Jacob had ever seen. Not counting Killer Croc, of course, since the supervillain wasn't entirely human.

"Firs' years! Gather round 'ere! Firs' years!" the black-haired and bearded man shouted as the first years gathered around him.

"Any idea who that huge guy is?" the black and green-haired boy asked his companions as they went towards him, getting quizzical looks from the other first years. It was either the fact that they weren't wearing the school robes or the young wolf and the black snake accompanying them.

"Yeah, my mum told me. He is Hagrid and he is the Keeper of Keys and Ground at Hogwarts" Daphne replied.

"Follow me" Hagrid told the slightly wide-eyed first years before turning around and leading them towards the shore of what appeared to be a lake. There were many boats lined on the beach.

"No more than four a boat" the giant man informed them before getting into one of the boats himself.

Slowly all of the first years filled up the boats. Jacob was in one boat with Daphne and Blaise and the fourth person to join them was a shy, brown-haired boy. His name was Neville Longbottom and the blue and green-eyed boy found the nervous boy nice. When the boats suddenly, yet smoothly, flowed onto the lake, the black and green-haired 11-year-old turned around in his seat and looked at Neville.

"Why are you so nervous, Nev? I can call you Nev, right?" Jacob inquired of boy who looked up, apparently startled to be addressed.

"My grand won't be very happy, if I don't get into Gryffindor, where my entire family has been" the brown-haired boy mumbled whilst looking at the bottom of the boat.

"Hey, Nev, look at me. Look at me!" Jacob ordered the very anxious first year.

"Sorry, I don't usually shout" the black and green-haired boy apologized, a sheepish look on his face, before becoming serious once again "But seriously – why is it so important where you are sorted? It's only a name and a colour and that's it. The thing that actually counts is the knowledge you'll gain during your stay at this school. Besides, as far as I know, a student is sorted according to their character – it doesn't matter where you're family has been, because they were different. So what if you'll end up in Slytherin, for example? I, personally, don't care" the black and green-haired boy tried to encourage Neville before turning back around and watching as the boats neared the castle.

"Duck your heads!" the gamekeeper of Hogwarts shouted and the four first years did as they were told.

However, when the boats suddenly stopped there were two splashes. Looking up, the black and green-haired boy was pleased to find the two arrogant kids he had met earlier – Draco Malfoy and the red-head – had decided to ignore the giant man's instructions and had, as a result, fallen into the water. Jacob was fascinated when the two flailing first years were suddenly dragged underwater before being lifted back into the boats by two very big and long tentacles.

"That was the Giant Squid. You two were lucky that he fished you out of there" Hagrid informed them whilst looking admonishingly **(?)** at the red-head and Malfoy, who were both soaking wet from their little "swim" in the lake.

"If you will follow me" the Keeper of Keys and Ground instructed them.

The giant man lead them through some even more gigantic than him doors and then up some stairs. Jacob realized that the castle was bigger than it appeared from afar. Maybe it would be a good idea to map out the castle grounds later on tonight? Going up some more stairs – this castle was sure to have many – Hagrid lead the first years towards a figure in dark green robes that Jacob immediately recognized. The 11-year-old grinned and was amused to see the Transfiguration teacher flinch slightly at seeing him.

"The first years, Professor McGonnagal" Hagrid said.

"Thank-you, Hagrid. I will take them from here" McGonnagal thanked the gamekeeper before he disappeared from the first years' view.

"Welcome to Hogwarts. The start-of-term banquet will begin shortly. But before you take your seats in the Great Hall you will be sorted into your houses. The Sorting is a very important ceremony because, while you are here, your house will be something like your family within Hogwarts. You will have classes with the rest of your house, sleep in your house dormitory and spend free time in your house common room" the stern teacher started, her gaze going over the newest batch of students.

"The four houses are called Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw and Slytherin. Each house has its own noble history and each has produced outstanding witches and wizards. While you are at Hogwarts, your triumphs will earn your house points and any rule-breaking will loose house points. At the end of the year, the house with the most points is awarded the House Cup – a great honour. I hope each of you will be a credit to whichever house becomes yours" McGonnagal continued.

"The Sorting Ceremony will take place in a few minutes in front of the rest of the school. I suggest you all smarten yourselves up as much as you can while you are waiting" she finished, her eyes lingering for a moment on Neville's cloak, which was fastened under his left ear, and on Jacob's, Blaise's and Daphne's unrobed _**(?)**_ forms.

"I will return when we are ready for you. Please wait quietly" the Scottish woman ordered them before disappearing through the doors into, what Jacob presumed, was the Great Hall Minnie had mentioned earlier. A few minutes later, the Transfiguration Mistress came out once again.

"Move along now" she said in a sharp voice, her eyes briefly looking at the group of first years "The Sorting Ceremony is about to begin" and with that the Scottish woman led them into the Great Hall.

The black and green-haired boy let out a whistle of amazement when he stepped through the huge doors – now he knew why it was called the Great Hall. It wasn't only just about the biggest room he had ever seen, but it was decorated in an old, yet somehow still stylish way. The floating candles above their heads, along with the enchanted ceiling, just added to the effect. Looking at what was obviously the teacher table, blue and green-eyes locked onto suddenly not-twinkling anymore blue eyes.

Dumbledore wanted nothing more than to jump over the table and slowly strangle Jack Napier. That boy was like a thorn in his side and what the boy had managed to do a month ago only infuriated the Headmaster even more.

_Flashback_

_ It was a nice, ordinary, sunny August morning. And Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore was getting out of bed. The night before had been…very taxing on his body and magic. Not to mention that he had had to shower at least 5 times to get __**most**__ of the tuna fish smell off of him. He couldn't even begin to think about how exactly a tuna fish so big existed, never mind that woman pulling it seemingly out of thin air._

_ Walking down into the Great Hall, the Headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry greeted his Deputy Headmistress, Minerva McGonnagal. It was clear to his eyes that the Transfiguration Professor had spent just as much time thinking about their encounter with Harry Potter….no, Jacob Napier yesterday evening (evening for them, morning for Jacob). After all, two powerful and talented people had been beaten by a mere 11-year-old and his parents!_

_ "I see, Minerva, that you had just as much of a rough night as me" Dumbledore stated, a sigh of exhaustion escaping him._

_ "Indeed, Albus. Jacob Napier is too good at wielding his magic and is, to put it bluntly, a little__ monster. I can't believe that he is going to be here come September 1__st__ – the school will be in ruins when he leaves after his 7__th__ year!" the middle-aged woman exclaimed, her frustration bringing out her usually absent Scottish brogue._

_ Just then a beautiful b__arn owl swooped into the Great Hall and dropped a letter into the Headmasters hands. Turning the envelope around, the aged wizard was surprised to see the sign of Gringotts on it. Why did the Wizarding Bank send him a letter? Curiosity getting the better of him and forgetting his most recent experience with opening letters before scanning them for spells, curses, jinxes or anything magical, the Headmaster opened it up. And promptly fell off his high chair when a laughing face on a spring sprang from within the envelope._

_ McGonnagal resisted the sudden urge to roll her eyes. Surely the Headmaster was still slightly confused because of the laughing gas from yesterday. Dumbledore got up from the floor, took the envelope in his hand, avoiding the laughing face, and peered inside. Minerva had the strange sense of déjà vu when a cloud of green smoke shot out of the envelope and directly in the ancient wizard's face._

_ Not even 3 minutes later, the annoyed Transfiguration Professor appeared in the lobby of St. Mungoes. Seeing the laughing Headmaster, the healer at the front desk looked at McGonnagal._

_ "Again?" the red-haired witch inquired, raising an eyebrow._

_ "Again" McGonnagal confirmed before giving the out-of-control Headmaster to two healers, who led him off to the third floor – Potion and Plant Poisoning. Again._

_ Two hours later the two Hogwarts Professors returned to the castle. The purple-robed wizard was glaring at just about any portrait that dared to comment on his sudden bursts of laughing. Once in his office, the angry wizard took out the __actual letter and quickly read through it, thinking that it was an early monthly statement concerning his account. What he read, though, caused him to gape in a dumbfounded way at the letter, making his Deputy Headmistress worry slightly. _

_ "I need some brandy" Dumbledore mumbled before going to some unknown part of his office, leaving the letter on the desk. Curious, the Scottish witch took the letter from the desk, unfolded it and read through it, her eyes widening with each line._

_ The letter stated that, in short, Dumbledore was removed as Harry Potter's or rather Jacob Napier's magical guardian and that approximately 4/5 of his vault's content would be taken from him and added to the Potter…sorry, Napier vault. Now, 4/5 would be quite a lot and that only left the old headmaster with around 200 000 galleons._

_ Returning to his desk with a bottle of brandy and a conjuring a glass, the old wizard gulped two entire glasses before turning around to Minerva, an unknown, yet malevolent gleam in his usually twinkling blue eyes._

_ "I am going to kill Jacob Napier. Once he gets here, of course" he mumbled before continuing with the drowning of his sorrows. _

_McGonnagal carefully and quietly backed out of the Headmaster's office and ran off to her own. She didn't want to be anywhere near the ancient wizard in a few hours. It seemed that an impromptu visit to McGonnagal manor was more than appropriate at this point of time._

_End of Flashback_

When Dumbledore snapped out of his walk down memory lane, the ancient wizard realized that he had missed the Sorting Hat's song. Oh, pity – he really did like the songs, even though they were sung by a hat. He watched as the Deputy Headmistress unrolled the scroll with the names of that year's new students.

"When I call your name, you will put on the Sorting Hat and sit down on the stool to be sorted" the stern Transfiguration teacher announced before raising the hat with one hand, looking at the names on the list and shouting out the first one.

"Hermione Granger!"

"Oh no, oh no, oh no, oh no…" a bushy-haired girl kept muttering as she slowly went up the steps and sat down on the stool. A few seconds went by before the hat shouted out the name of the house.

"Ravenclaw!"

"Draco Malfoy!"

"Slytherin!" the hat cried out before even touching the blond-haired boy's head.

"Blaise Zabini!"

Jacob and Daphne looked at each other as they watched their friend get sorted. They had made a deal on the train that no matter what house they would end up in they would still be friends.

"Slytherin!"

"Susan Bones" the Transfiguration teacher called out next and a slightly nervous, red-haired girl came out of the crowd and sat down on the stool, ready to be sorted.

"Hufflepuff!"

"Ronald Weasley!" was the next name and Jacob saw the arrogant red-head from earlier go up the stairs and sit down.

"Gryffindor!" the hat shouted and the black and green-haired boy immediately knew that he would rather die than get sorted into the red and gold house.

"Daphne Greengrass!"

"Slytherin!" the Sorting Hat shouted after about a minute. Just as he had done with Blaise, the blue and green-eyed boy clapped along with the Slytherins.

"Neville Longbottom!"

"Relax, Nev. The hat ain't gonna bite off your head and neither will your gran" Jacob encouraged the nervous brown-haired boy, who smiled in return, went up stairs and sat down on the stool.

"Hufflepuff!" the hat announced and Jacob clapped. He was very much against other people manipulating other people like that. That didn't mean that he didn't enjoy manipulating people himself.

"Jack Napier!" McGonnagal shouted out the next name, a barely noticeable but still present tremble in her voice. Jacob only grinned as he sat down on the stool. The hat was placed on his head and immediately the world went black.

_**Inner mindscape:**_

"My word! How did you get in here?" a strange figure exclaimed, watching as the black and green-haired boy looked around himself.

"Where are we?" Jacob asked.

"This is your mind, my young friend" the stranger exclaimed before stepping out of the shadows where he had been standing.

The man had on a black cape that covered his body and a hat, not unlike the Sorting Hat, on his head, its brim covering his face in darkness and only two, multi-coloured eyes staring at him. The main colours seemed to be red, yellow, blue and green and created a beautiful prism of colour.

"This is my mind? Wicked!" Jacob exclaimed before observing his surroundings once more, but with newfound interest.

It was unlike anything he had ever seen before. There were stairs upon stairs with many doors in one half of his mind, whilst the other half was occupied by what appeared to be a forest. The stairs were odd: they went in every which way – up, down, sideways, diagonally and there were even some stairs that were upside down! The forest, whilst not as "warped" as the staircases, was dark and gloomy. And yet Jacob found himself feeling safe and happy in its proximity. In the space between the forest and the staircases there was nothing but a grassy field. Many bubbles floated around in the air above the field. They were blue, green or black in colour.

"Child, you have the strangest mind I have ever seen" the Sorting Hat, or at least the black and green-haired boy assumed it was the Sorting Hat, announced.

"But the question is – how am I supposed to sort you now?" the clearly confused man mused, observing the many bubbles "I suppose that these are your memories, young one" the Hat stated before touching a green bubble as it floated passed him.

Jacob found himself relieving his very first major crime – a bank heist – and the moments before it. Setting up the explosives, whilst not difficult, had been an annoying task and the 11-year-old, remembering this, vowed to himself to invent a way of getting the devices set up in a less annoying and less time-consuming way.

"Popping" back into the field, the Sorting Hat proceeded to touch one of the black bubbles and Jacob saw the murder of his "relatives" replay. The blue and green-eyed boy couldn't help but grin – that had been without a doubt one of the most memorable moments of his life.

Finally, the Sorting Hat touched one of the blue bubbles and both Jacob and the Sorting Hat were laughing by the time the memory ended – it was the one where he and his family had beaten Minnie and Dumbles. The Sorting Hat really couldn't help it – seeing Albus Dumbledore being beaten with a tuna fish was just too funny not to laugh!

"Well, Ravenclaw would suit you well – you've come for knowledge, but it's a specific type. So the raven's house won't do. Gryffindor is clearly out of the question, since you are anything but reckless. Well, maybe a little bit, but you never do things without thinking them through first. You are loyal, certainly, but only to your family and friends. That leaves Slytherin…Yes, the house of snakes would help nurture your strongest character traits and that is also where your two new friends, Blaise and Daphne, were sorted. It also helps that you are able to speak to snakes" the Sorting Hat told Jacob, its eyes swirling from one colour to another before finally settling on emerald green.

"Why would that help? No, never mind – I'll find out myself. You won't tell Dumbles anything about my mind, will you?" the black and green-haired 11-year-old hesitantly asked.

"Rest assured, I will not utter even a single word. But now we must get going – we have let everyone wait long enough" the Hat said before everything went pitch black once again.

_**Great H**__**all, Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry:**_

"Slytherin!" the hat shouted and the Slytherins clapped politely.

Getting up from the stool, the grinning black and green-haired boy went over to his two friends and sat down across from them.

"Well, guess we're in one house then" Jacob happily exclaimed before turning around and watching the rest of the sorting ceremony.

"Before we start the feast, I would like to say a few words: nitwit, blubber, oddment, tweak!" the old wizard announced before suddenly laughing crazily for a few seconds and then sitting back down on his chair.

Jacob grinned as he started eating – it seemed that the most harmless version of his laughing gas had long-term effects. During the rest of the dinner the trio of friends discussed the upcoming school year, Dumbledore's strange behaviour ("Jacob…you wouldn't happen to have anything to do with it, would you?" "What? Me? How could I possibly have something to do with it?") and, after the Headmaster's boring speech and interesting warning, the third floor corridor.

Following the prefects towards the dungeons was no problem for Jacob, though he was slightly unhappy that it would, probably, be very cold down there during the winter season. It was the password to the common room that surprised him.

"Pureblood? Isn't that a bit too…easy to guess?" Daphne questioned and Jacob nodded his head in agreement. He was about to reply when suddenly a black figure swooped into the common room, where the prefects had told all of the first years to gather. Reflexes triggered by that, the black and green-haired boy clenched his hand into a fist and charged it with his magic before realizing that the figure actually wasn't Batman.

"I am your Head of House, Professor Severus Snape. I am the Potions teacher and I expect high marks in that subject from everyone, no exceptions. There are only a few rules that you must follow at all times. First, outside the common room we act as a house, as a family. We stick together. Two, no one is to be late for any classes. Three – any quarrels between yourselves is to be kept inside the House. Otherwise the other Houses will think we are weak. Last but not least – if you break the rules, make damn sure that you are not caught breaking them!" the greasy-haired teacher informed them, his coal black eyes sweeping across the room and landing on Jacob and his two familiars.

"Mr. Napier, the rules clearly state that only owls, cats or toads are allowed inside the castle. You will also wear the standard school uniform from now on" Snape reminded the black and green-haired boy, who only grinned.

"Firstly, _**professor**_, Ophois and Wadjet are my bonded familiars and as per Hogwarts regulations I am allowed to bring them. As for the school uniform, _**sir**_, the letter and the rules state that I have to own a standard school uniform – that is true. However, it isn't written anywhere that I have to wear it" Jacob retorted, blue and green eyes gleaming mischievously and piercing the Potion Master's coal black ones.

Snape didn't let his shock on. This was the first time that a student had actually found a loop hole in the school regulations and what was worse – Snape couldn't do anything about it. The fact that the boy also had two, and not one, bonded familiar suggested that he was powerful.

"Very well. Prefects, show the first years to their rooms" the greasy-haired man ordered before going out of the common room and back to his quarters – he had a lot to think about.

_**30 minutes later…**_

Jacob was lying on his bed, looking up at the ceiling of his room. It was pretty cool that every Slytherin had his or her own room. Grinning, the black and green-haired boy pulled out a mirror from his bedside table and looked at it.

"Home" he clearly spoke to it, watching as soon the image of his father appeared in it.

"Hiya Jake! So, how's it going there?" Jack happily asked his son.

They had come across the two-way mirrors whilst going through Diagon Alley. This was just too good a way of communication to not buy a set.

Jacob proceeded to tell the blond-haired man everything, including the fact that his non-lethal version of the SmileX had a long-term effect. After exchanging a few more words, where Jacob found out nothing interesting had happened in Gotham yet, the black and green-haired boy put away the mirror and went to sleep. He could hardly wait for the next day to arrive and with it – the beginning of his reign of chaos in Hogwarts.

_**Harry Potter x Batman**_

Well, I hope you enjoyed this chapter.^_^

Please leave a review!^_^


	9. Chapter 9: First Week, Month, Impression

Hi People!^_^

Well, here is chapter 9! I'm terribly sorry for the slight delay but I was suddenly overcome with extreme exhaustion yesterday and I just couldn't bring myself to finish the chapter…^_^'…

Well, enjoy reading this chapter and please leave a nice little review at the end! I'd really appreciate it.^_^

_**Harry Potter x Batman**_

_**Chapter 9**__**: First Week, Month and Impressions**_

Jacob woke up the next morning with a grin on his face. Today was a very special day and he intended to make it all the more special – it was the beginning of chaos. Well, not chaos, technically, more like the beginning of chaos in Hogwarts. And he would make sure that no one ever forgot him after he left Hogwarts. What better time to start his rule of terror than on the first day of his first year?

Getting dressed in a pair of black jeans, black army boots a dark purple T-shirt with black designs on it and a black leather jacket to top it all off, the black and green-haired boy woke up his familiars.

"Come on now, Ophois, Wadjet. Don't want to miss out on aaaaall the fun we will inevitably have today, do you?" the blue and green-eyed boy cheerfully nudged them awake and waited for the young shadow wolf to stretch and the Egyptian Asp to wrap herself around his shoulder.

Getting back to the Great hall was an easy task for Jacob, unlike his fellow first year classmates – they didn't have a photographic memory like him. And so Jacob soon found himself entering the Great Hall and, spotting Neville at the Hufflepuff table, went over to sit down next to him.

"Hiya Nev! So, how'd you sleep?" the very happy 11-year-old inquired of the slightly wide-eyed brown-haired boy, whilst piling a few fruits on his plate, as well as a toast and a bit of jam.

"Um, Jacob, why are you here?" Neville hesitantly asked the first year Slytherin, who had buttered the toast and was now putting the strawberry jam on it.

"Why? Oh, Nev, can't a guy visit his friends and have breakfast with them?" Jacob innocently exclaimed before continuing with his previous task – eating his toast.

"Well, traditionally the students eat at their own House tables" a new voice said, making blue and green eyes look at another first year. Jacob recognized her slightly freckled face and red hair almost immediately and smiled at the girl when she sat down and started piling he own plate with food.

"Good morning to you too, Susan!" he greeted her, a smile on his face "and screw tradition!" he added before moving on to pealing a banana.

"Yes, we've noticed that you don't like to follow the rules" the red-haired Hufflepuff girl told him, her eyes going over his attire.

"Nope! I just found loopholes in the regulations, if you're referring to my familiars and that pesky dress-code. As for the breakfast-thing – it ain't written anywhere that it is forbidden" the black and green-haired boy informed her, finishing his banana.

"I bet you're going to cause a lot of mayhem, Jake" Neville smiled at his new friend. The Longbottom heir was very happy that he finally had a friend beside Susan. He had known the red-haired girl since he was 6 years old.

"Absitively posolutely! And, what's more, I'm searching for accomplices – care to join me?" the black and green-haired Slytherin slyly proposed, watching as the two Hufflepuffs debated it "Awwww, come on now! It'll be fun!" Jacob pleaded with them

"I'm in!" Neville finally said after a few seconds. He wanted to be different than his parents and make his gran see that he was his own person and not their copy!

"Well, if Nev is in, then so I am I!" Susan joined. Soon the new trio of pranksters was whispering over their cups of hot chocolate and discussing plans for their first prank. Soon, however, it was time of the day.

"Remember guys – first we've gotta get into the good graces of most, if not all the professors! So we'll wait about a month before setting our plan into motion!" he reminded his new partners in crime…uh, prank before getting up and leaving the Great Hall.

It was with a small skip in his step that the black and green-haired boy went into the Potions classroom, well before anyone else had arrived. He was amused when his Head of House had grumbled on his way to the Hufflepuff table and handed Jacob his timetable. The 11-year-old had been overjoyed that he had Double Potions first and then Double Transfiguration after that. He was more than sure that he would get top grades in those particular classes. Not that grades mattered much to the Slytherin first year, but he was very excited about the Potions classes. Maybe he and Sevvie – as he had nicknamed the Potions Master – would be able to get along better.

Seeing his Head of House in the Potions laboratory, the black and green-haired boy decided to startle his teacher.

"Good morning, professor!" he joyously exclaimed, whilst putting his stuff down and making himself comfortable in one of the seats in the front row. The Potion Master quickly turned around, wand pointed at the slightly smiling Slytherin.

"Mr. Napier, why are you here?" the greasy-haired man questioned the first year.

"What is it with everyone asking me that today? I am here because Potions is first on my timetable for today" Jacob replied, rolling his eyes. Just then the door opened and over the course of the next few minutes the rest of the Slytherin first years and the Gryffindor first years filed into the room, Daphne and Blaise sitting down one either side of Jacob.

"You are here to learn the subtle science and exact art of potion making" the hook-nosed professor began "I don't expect you will really understand the beauty of the softly simmering cauldron with its shimmering fumes, the delicate power of liquids that creep through human veins, bewitching the mind, ensnaring the senses...I can teach you how to bottle fame, brew glory, even stopper death – if you aren't as big a bunch of dunderheads as I usually have to teach" he finished with a snide remark.

"Mr. Weasley!" the Potion Master suddenly shouted, startling the aforementioned red-head and making the prat jump up in his seat.

"Tell me, what would I get, if I added powdered root of asphodel to an infusion of wormwood?" Snape coolly asked.

"I don't know, sir" Weasley replied, his wide-eyes showing the fear that the first year Gryffindor was feeling. Jacob raised an eyebrow – wasn't Gryffindor the House of Courage?

"Well, let's try again. Where, Mr. Weasley, would you look, if I asked you to find me a bezoar?" the Slytherin head of House asked, crossing his arms.

"I don't know, sir" the scared red-head answered, his fingers starting to tremble.

"And what is the difference between monkshood and wolfsbane?" came the third question and Jacob was amused to see the terrified Gryffindor actually shake in his seat.

"I don't know, sir" Weasley meekly replied, trying to make himself as small as possible.

"15 points from Gryffindor. For thinking you are above all others, Weasley, and haven't opened your books yet" the black-haired teacher announced.

Snape put on one of his trademark sneers on his face before looking around the classroom. His coal black eyes landed on Jacob, whose blue and green-coloured ones stared right back into his own, a silent challenge clearly visible in them.

"Mr. Napier, do you know the answers to the questions I asked?" the Potion Master inquired of the first year Slytherin, accepting the challenge.

"Certainly, sir. The infusion of wormwood and asphodel is commonly found in the sleeping potion known as the Draught of Living Death, although such a combination is also used for other less known potions. A bezoar can be found in the stomach of a goat and can counteract most poisons. As for the monkshood and wolfsbane – there is no difference. They are one and the same plant, also called aconite" the black and green-haired 11-year-old dutifully answered, an excited gleam in his two-coloured eyes. The look in the boy's eyes did not escape the Potions Master and he was pleasantly surprised by it – it was the look of someone who was fond of potion making.

"Correct on all points, Mr. Napier. 15 points to Slytherin. I want everyone to write down what he said" the Slytherin Head of House ordered, walking back to his desk and scribbling something down.

By the end of the class Jacob was very happy and was whistling a tune as he walked down the corridor and towards the Transfiguration classroom. Blaise and Daphne were looking at him as if he were strange – he had, after all, insisted on doing most of the potion by himself. Their boil curing potion, or rather his, had been the best one in the entire class. Snape had assured them that they would get full marks for it.

The black and green-haired boy grinned when he entered the classroom – Minnie was sitting on her desk in her cat form. His two friends glanced at each other when they noticed his even "sunnier" disposition at the sight. Maybe he liked cats? As if to deter them from thinking that, Ophois growled threateningly in the tabby cat's direction. Alright, so maybe Jacob didn't like cats after all.

At least 3 minutes had passed since the start of the lesson and Minnie had yet to transform. Jacob frowned. She was waiting for something, obviously, but what exactly? He carefully looked around the room and spotted the hold-up – there were two empty seats. So she wasn't transforming because of two students who were late? Two Gryffindor students, at that – all Slytherins were on time, as per House rules. With a loud bang the door to the classroom flew open and running inside were none other than the Gryffindor prat, Ron Weasley, and another one of the new Gryffindors, Seamus Finnigan.

"We made it" the stupid red-head sighed in relief – too soon.

The entire class gasped as the cat on Professor McGonnagal's desk jumped down and transformed in mid-flight, revealing the stern figure of Professor McGonnagal herself. The Weasley boy was, in fact, so startled that he fell on his back, his head making a small "crack" sound as it hit the hard stone floor. Jacob was highly amused by the sight and was grinning almost manically when the Transfiguration teacher turned her brown eyes to him. Jacob saw the Scottish witch flinch for the second time since his arrival yesterday.

That lesson had been entertaining as was manipulating some of the dumber Gryffindors into doing things that would warrant them a loss of house points. The House of the Lion had lost 25 points by the end of class and Slytherin had gained 15. Even Draco Malfoy had been impressed by the manipulations. What the black and green-haired boy had learned in those two lessons, though, was far more valuable to him – the basics of any kind of transfiguration. Imagination was the key and Jacob was grinning at the end of the class – he had plenty of imagination.

That afternoon, after eating lunch, they had Care of Magical Creatures. Jacob thought that the teacher – Mr. Kettleburn – had been absolutely delighted at the amount of knowledge the black and green-haired boy had shown during his first Care of Magical Creatures class and had almost fainted at the sight of Ophois. The kind teacher had even invited Jacob over for a cup of tea on Saturday afternoon. The blue and green-eyed Slytherin secretly thought that the old teacher actually wanted to talk more about Ophois than anything else.

But so far the Slytherin first year couldn't complain about it - he had heard of how delicious the Care of Magical Creatures teacher's cookies were. In fact, they were downright famous amongst the few students who were in the elderly man's good graces and that just encouraged the 11-year-old boy more – if there was one thing he loved above anything else in the world, it was cookies.

The next day Jacob once again sat on the Hufflepuff table for breakfast. That earned him a few glares from his housemates. Neville and Susan had been amused by his reaction to their concern for his well-being.

"Jacob, aren't you worried that they are going to stab you in the back in your sleep?" the slightly shy Hufflepuff had asked. The black and green-haired boy sighed – he would have to remedy this. Shy just didn't fit in with causing chaos.

"Why do you think they would do that?" the Slytherin first-year had replied, curiosity written on his face.

"The fact that they are sending you murderous glares behind your back?" Susan proposed, watching as the black and green-haired boy simply shrugged his shoulders and continued to eat his apple. The two Hufflepuffs hadn't missed the smirk playing on his face, though, and were more worried for the Slytherins that might attempt to do something rather than the Slytherin first year.

Herbology had initially piqued Jacob's interest. Dr. Pamela Isley, or better known as Poison Ivy, had taken a liking to him, despite the fact that he was the Joker's son. She had been extremely happy when she had found out that her plants liked the back-then 8-year-old boy and even more so when it turned out that he had a green thumb. It was a bonus that he could understand the plants' feelings and words by touching them and sending a wave of his magic through them.

Naturally, the first thing that Jacob did when all of the Slytherin and Hufflepuff first years had gathered in Greenhouse 1 was to touch the plant that they were going to study and send a wave of magic through it. Mme. Sprout – the Herbology teacher and Head of Hufflepuff House – had been therefore very startled when suddenly one of the vines of one of the plants almost affectionately brushed the Slytherin first year's cheek and proceeded to lift him into the air. Seeing the startled look on his professor's face, the black and green-haired boy simply shrugged.

"What? Plants like me" was all the 11-year-old Slytherin told her.

By the end of the Double Herbology lesson – it seemed that all of their classes were in blocks – the blue and green-eyed boy had managed to teach Neville how to feel the plant's feelings. It seemed that his new Hufflepuff friend was a lover of plants and he resolved to somehow arrange a meeting between him and Aunt Ivy – he was more than sure that the two would get along fabulously.

Double Defense against the Dark Arts was next and Jacob could have sworn that the teacher – Professor Quirrel – was afraid of his own shadow. He had thrown a small piece of chalk he had found lying on the ground under his desk at the stuttering wizard and, if he hadn't known any better, he would have said that the turban-wearing man had broken the Guinness World Record for highest jump caused by fright. After the first 25 minutes of the class had passed, the black and green-haired boy had made up his mind – he was going to sleep in those classes.

On that Tuesday afternoon they had had Double Charms. Jacob was secretly wondering if the Charms teacher – Professor Flitwick – was in any way possibly related to goblins. The man certainly had the right stature. But upon hearing that the short, yet kind wizard had been a Dueling Champion at one point, the black and green-haired Slytherin knew not to underestimate the man. He had enjoyed the Charms Master's way of teaching and wished that all teachers were like that. Then again, they wouldn't be so much fun, if they actually were.

Wednesday morning came and, as expected, the black and green-haired boy had breakfast at the House of the Badger's table. Neville was up and about early as usual and when the 11-year-old Slytherin joined him they went onto their usual breakfast banter. When the morning post came, however, the timid **(?)** first year Hufflepuff had turned a sickly pale colour after a raven had dropped a letter onto the boy's lap.

"Hey, why the pale face?" Jacob asked his friend, slightly worried but also puzzled when the Longbottom heir showed him the envelope.

Neville was very worried. Actually, he was downright terrified at the thought of what the envelope contained. At least it wasn't a Howler, though that didn't mean anything. He remembered how his gran had told him that he had to get in Gryffindor, no matter what. It was the only house that his gran had told him he could get into. It was the only house the elderly Longbottom woman accepted. Now that he had gotten into Hufflepuff, the brown-haired boy was as nervous as if the hounds of hell would leap up at him any second now. When he looked at his two best friends' worried faces – admittedly, he wasn't sure if it was worry of curiosity on Jacob's face – he immediately knew that they would be there for him no matter what happened.

"It's from gran" Neville informed his friend, gulping as his trembling fingers opened it and extracted the letter.

Jacob was astounded when Neville turned an even paler colour than before after reading it. Wordlessly, the black and green-haired boy gently took the letter from the horrified Hufflepuff and, huddling closer to Susan, he began to read it. Not out loud, of course. What he read infuriated him. A lot.

Neville,

News has just reached me that you, my grandson, son of Alice and Frank Longbottom, were sorted into Hufflepuff, of all houses. This displeases me greatly and shames the family name. Therefore, to remove the stain from the family I have done the only thing possible.

Henceforth you, Neville Alexander Longbottom, are banned from the family for the shame you have brought upon it. Your trust fund at Gringotts will not be removed and will become your own vault.

Live your life as you will.

Sincerely,

Lady Longbottom

"I'm sorry, Nev" Susan tried to comfort the clearly distraught boy, turning for support towards Jacob. But the black and green-haired boy was looking down, his two-coloured eyes hidden by his spiky bangs.

"Nev. Neville, look at me. Look at me!" the black and green-haired boy ordered his Hufflepuff friend for the second time, startling him. Blue and green-eyes met chocolate brown ones "You are not alone, Nev, and you are always welcome to live with me and my family" Jacob firmly told Neville. The brown-haired boy nodded and a small smile appeared on his face, though his eyes remained sad.

It was a good thing that they had Double History of Magic first on that day. It was, without a doubt, the worst thing Jacob had ever gone through. The drawling voice, the monotonous nature of the teacher's sentences, the slow and painfully clear enunciation of every syllable in every single word – it was a one-way ticket to death. Even the questions and the sentences with exclamation marks at their end were pronounced monotonously! It was like the teacher – Professor Binns – was on automatic pilot. Then again, the guy had died whilst sleeping, probably dreaming about the Goblin wars. A friggin' ghost was their teacher! How low could a school sink to let a ghost – a transparent, lifeless being – teach?

On that evening they had their first Astronomy class and, once again, the Slytherin first year found nothing interesting in that class. The teacher – Mme. Sinistra – was nice and everything but the classes were just sooo boring and dull. Who wanted to know what this constellation and that constellation represented for the Wizarding World? Jacob didn't really care. Yet another class he could sleep in – perfect.

Thursday they had Double Potions, once again with the Gryffindors. Sabotaging their potions was fun, especially the Weasley boy's. It was a bit too soon to introduce the school to chaos, but a small preparation wouldn't hurt. Explosions were always something that the black and green-haired boy was fond of watching. To the Slytherin first year's delight, the Potion Master seemed to have taken a liking to him. He had asked his Hufflepuff friends about their own lesson with Snape and they had informed him that everything had gone well, meaning that Snape had noticed them in a good light. Their first potion hadn't been perfect, but it had been amongst the best. Double Charms and Double Herbology that day had gone well and, excluding McGonnagal, most teachers liked them.

The only classes that Jacob actually had with his Hufflepuff friends were Herbology and Charms. He wasn't blind to the apparent feud between Gryffindor and Slytherin and couldn't wait to be the catalyst for a full-out war between the two houses. After all, he was an Agent of Chaos and the rivalry between the House of the Lion and the House of the Serpent was just too good of an opportunity to miss.

Friday was Double Care of Magical Creatures, Double Transfiguration and Double Defense against the Dark Arts. That first week-end Jacob taught Susan and Neville how to play poker and, with candy as stakes, the Hufflepuff duo and Slytherin Trio passed a good time. Blaise and Daphne were still hesitant to cross the house table border, but Jacob was sure that by the end of that year he would be able to convince them.

The rest of the month went by in a similar fashion – Jacob had managed to get into the good books of all teachers. Well, almost all teachers – the Transfiguration professor had every reason to think otherwise. After all, she had seen him and his family and she had seen him fight. She had been bested by him, a mere 11-year-old who hadn't even gotten his first wand back then!

And so the traditional teacher's meeting took place at the end of the first month. The teacher's meeting existed since the founding of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and served to discuss the new student's achievements, behaviour and anything else worth remarking upon. The list of students was always in an alphabetical order and the meetings always took place in the Headmaster's office.

By the end of the meeting, Dumbledore was, on the outside, his usual cheerful self. On the inside, though, he was slightly worried. It appeared that Jacob Napier would be an even greater thorn in his side than he had previously thought. The 11-year-old Slytherin first year had almost all of the teachers under the illusion that he was a little angel, so to say. But Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore knew better. He always did. That little snake in the grass was planning something and he would bet his entire stash of delicious (at least according to him) lemon drops that he was right. To his relief, Minerva supported his idea. Then again, she had witnessed Jacob Napier's and his family's strength.

Suddenly, the Headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry felt a cold shiver run down his spine. What about the third floor corridor? That conniving black and green-haired boy was sure to go up there at one point or another. What if he somehow figured out that the Philosopher's Stone was in there? What if he, by some miracle, managed to get through all of the obstacles? But no, the wards around the place hadn't alerted him to anyone passing through there. With a sigh of relief, the old wizard leaned back in his chair and popped a lemon drop into his mouth. Yes, everything was well. He only had to keep a closer eye on Jacob Napier.

In the Slytherin dorm rooms, meanwhile, Jacob Napier was going to bed, the small red stone he had retrieved from that mirror at the end of the simple obstacle course starting on the Third Floor corridor safely tucked into the depths of his trunk. He had a beautiful present for his Aunt Kitty for Christmas. She absolutely loved precious stones.

_**Harry Potter x Batman**_

*runs for cover* Please, don't hurt me! I had to make Neville more independent! I always thought that his grandmother put too much pressure on him…^_^'…

I hope you enjoyed this chapter as much as the others.^_^

Please leave a review!^_^


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